Planet Alien

I Miss It.

2010-02-02T00:46:00.001-05:00

Writing that is. I miss it terribly. Not the tech writing thing, because frankly, that still bores me to goddamn tears (she says, knowing she’s meeting with a guy about a possible tech writing gig tomorrow morning… Sigh.). I mean that I miss writing here. I get my writing cravings out on Facebook now, but get pissed when my status update is “too long” and I have to try to condense it. ANNOYING. I ramble. God knows I ramble. So I feel hindered on Facebook when I’m trying to write the latest episode in my life and I’m told by Facebook I can’t post it because I’ve used 523 characters. (And yes, I call them “episodes”…. because more often than not, my life is a goddamn sitcom. Or at least in my head it is.)

So I’m back for now. I can’t promise I’ll stick around for long (because in my own fucked up head, I’m ADHD and don’t know if I’ll really stick around.) And I may start up a whole new blog. Only because over the years, I’ve said WAY too much shit here about people that are now (grudgingly) my friends on Facebook. And if I ever post the super secret link to this blog and they’re bored and start reading back through, it could present a big problem for me. LOL! If I do decide to start using a new blog address, I’ll post it here for those of you that only have this link. We’ll see. I’m not making any promises. I just know that if I don’t do something with the crazy ass random thoughts whirling around in my brain, I’m going to explode. And that would be messy. And Steve is anal and would be pissed if I exploded in the kitchen and got blood all over the white kitchen cabinets. So we’ll see how this goes. Again… no promises. I need to think of a quirky blog title tonight for the brand spanking new blog and secure it and all that other good stuff.

But if I DO decide to roll with this, I’m giving fair warning that it will be a no-holds-barred blog. I’ll drop “F-bombs like it’s my job (but only when appropriate to the entry that day). And I’ll have many entries that are random one or two sentences throughout the day (because Facebook has destroyed my ability to post long updates). But we’ll find the groove we’re looking for and go from there. Promise.

So stay tuned. I may be back tomorrow. Or I may be back in 6-months. God knows you can never take me for my word….

She’s Alive!

2009-08-19T10:02:00.001-04:00

Me that is. I’m alive. Barely on some days, but I’m here. I could write a big long post to catch you up to date, but would anyone really read it? (Not to mention I don’t feel like it. LOL!) So here are some photos from our summer. One and half weeks left of summer vacation for the kids. Bittersweet. I’ll miss them, but I think we’re ALL ready for them to go back.

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I Suck Ass.

2009-06-08T23:59:00.001-04:00

That’s right. I said it. I suck ass. Sigh. I am SUCKING at this blogging thing here on the ol’ personal blog. I’ve been quite efficient over on the other blog I contribute to. But by the time I get done with that, take care of the kids, take care of the husband (ahem…), take care of the house, post on Facebook, post on Twitter, make some shit that allows me to release my inner artist, etc., this ol’ blog gets neglected and I’m just too tired or uninspired to update it. I hate that I don’t post here anymore, so I’m going to try really, really hard to start posting fairly regularly again. I’m not sure who here even cares anymore (if any of you are even here anymore), but we’ll just plug along and see what I can do. LOL!

Hmmm… I’m not sure if any of my updating would interest any of you at this point. Or how many of you follow me on Twitter or Facebook (which means you already know everything about me), but I’ll give a brief summary.

School’s out… we joined the public pool for the summer and the girls drive me nuts everyday begging to go… I take them but hate it, only because my only suit that fits me is a plain brown one-piece that makes me look like a big piece of wet lumpy shit (need to get a new one this week)… Steve’s busy with work and got blonde highlights last week that make him look like a rock star and makes me want to dry hump him or something… lots of awesome friends have been stopping over a lot on the weekends which kicks ass, regardless of the ridiculous hangovers and lack of sleep we’re getting because of it… my creative mind is in overdrive and I’m a bit worried how much of that I’ll be able to satisfy now that the kids are home all day everyday… I have some cool ideas in the works that could either make or break me, but no one was ever successful without trying, so we’ll see what happens… I lost my wallet today and was thrilled when someone turned it in with all $150-ish still in it, untouched (I knew there were still good people out there in the world)…

Dear god. I keep thinking of more to add. But I’m going to end this. Only because I don’t want this blog to become an online journal of my everyday life. Most of you (I think) are my friends on Facebook, which means you already know ALL of this stuff, so why reiterate it here. Nope. Starting tomorrow, this is going to become like the “old blog” again. Humorous stories… essays… observations… conversations… etc. So thanks for bearing with me as I just rambled on about nothing. It’s my gift. Enjoy it. ;)

Creative Headgear

2009-05-21T11:37:00.001-04:00

I SWEAR I’ll be back later with a real post, but for now, I just wanted to let you know I put up today’s blog post over on the Everyday Artist blog. Go see me making an absolute FOOL of myself while rocking out wearing the family’s hats.

My first blog post is up…

2009-05-20T11:03:00.001-04:00

…over at Everyday Artist. Come discover the hidden writer in yourself.

(I’ll be posting again tomorrow too, but it won’t have anything to do with writing. Promise.)

5-4-3-2-1… Blastoff!

2009-05-18T00:21:00.001-04:00

The site is officially launched! The one I was telling you about yesterday. The one I’m really, REALLY excited about.

Sweet, kind, fiercely talented Danielle Donaldson asked me a week or so ago to be on her team. I love me some Danielle, and once she filled me in on the whole concept, I was MORE than happy to accept. The new site is here. (Once you get there and poke around for a bit, click on the “Team” link. That’s right… I’m “The Yard Dawg” and if any of you try to cross me, I’ll chew your asses off. LOL!) On the site, we’ll highlight Danielle’s digital designs, photography in general, and being everyday artists in many aspects of our lives.

We also have a blog. Secretly, I most excited about the blog. (Well, not so secret anymore. Sorry Danielle if that was the wrong thing to say. LOL!) There are 4 of us that will have a set day every week to blog (my day is Thursdays), with the 5th day being for guest bloggers, kid bloggers, etc. (we won’t blog on weekends). Each of us has a certain “specialty” that we’re best at/do most often/were chosen for/etc., but there will be a lot of cross-posting about particular aspects of artistic stuff too.

I’ll use a lot of my posts to get everyone to think about writing. Not novels, mind you, because hell, even I haven’t written one of those (yet). Just little stuff. Crazily fun writing exercises… Writing ideas that make you think (or not think if you’re so inclined)... Journaling projects that get your kids involved… Some easy stuff… Stuff that involves a little more thought… Generally, all aspects of the writing spectrum. Most people assume that keeping a journal involves long paragraphs, daily updating, etc. but it doesn’t have to be like that. My goal is to make people realize that capturing their moments and memories through writing don’t have to involve a lot of work. I even have writing and art projects in mind that involve nothing more than jotting down (literally) one word a day. It’s going to be FUN. I promise.

But I’ll also be posting about other stuff. Scrapbooking, easy home projects to create awesome artwork for your walls even if you’ve never scrapped a page in your life and don’t have the software tools to do what some other people can, make you realize how words and lyrics and nature and all sorts of other things can inspire us all, “art” in the sense of just looking at yourself and realizing that your everyday responsibilities as wives, mothers, sisters, chauffeurs, coaches, house cleaners, etc. (whether you realize it or not) make you force yourself to be creative and invent things and ideas that you normally wouldn’t.

There’s also a set day on the blog to get our kids involved in being creative and give other kids motivation and ideas for discovering their inner artist. Art knows no age limit, so we’re hoping you all realize that your kids are artists too and can often spark that inspiration in us (and other kids their age) that we didn’t even know was there.

It’s a new project, which means transition. So bear with us and let us grow and develop. We all have the same goal in mind and I promise that as we each blog over the next few weeks, you’ll watch us all grow and develop and find our own groove. I’m REALLY hoping that you’ll take the journey with us and pick and choose which posts you most relate to (or ideally, choose all of them! LOL!). Figure out where the “inner artist” in you really shines and then run with it. And if we manage to turn our vision into a reality, you’ll start to realize that you’re an artist in ways you didn’t even think about before. :)

So add the blog to your feed reader (and then actually read it), join in on the challenges when we post them, comment when you feel inclined to, and join the Flickr group (Tink & the two Kelly’s, I’ll kick your ass if you don’t… LOL!), and allow yourselves to grow right along with us. I swear on all things holy that if you stick with us and help us iron out the kinks, we’ll get you on the right path. I have WAY too many friends that say, “I wish I was as creative as you,” without even realizing that they ARE creative… just not in the same way I am. We ALL are in our own ways, and the blog is going to be about discovering how to figure out exactly in what way you are.

So here we go. Buckle up and ride along. :)

Where do I start?

2009-05-16T19:48:00.002-04:00

Hmmm… starting points are hard for me, generally speaking, simply because I’m a rambling sort of chick. I jump from thing to thing… lose focus and then gain incredible focus at the drop of a hat… have too many thoughts swirling to possibly get them all down… So let’s get started.

Since being laid off, I’ve been busier than I was when I was working if that’s possible. But it’s almost all good, FUN busy stuff and not that “busy” that makes us want to rip our hair out (although I’ve had my fair share of that too).

But my biggest sucker of time has been a new adventure I was invited to participate in. I’ll give more details in the next few days, but a crazy creative friend of mine asked me to help her launch a new website with a fantastic concept. It does involve digital scrapbooking to an extent, but it’s so much more than that (in our heads anyway). It’s about discovering and nurturing the everyday artist in all of us.

Art doesn’t have to involve paint or scrapbooking or pencils or photography. Although all of those kick ass, “art” is so much more than that. It’s how we live everyday of our lives. It’s what we see when we look around in our everyday lives. It’s how we come up with solutions to the normal stuff in our lives. It’s the simple notes we jot down to our spouses and kids. It’s the recipes we event and the organizational solutions we come up with. It’s all of that and more. And the new site is going to reflect all of that. Me and 3 other women are going to do our damndest to make each and every one of you realize that you all have an inner “artist” in you begging to get out. And we’re also going to make you realize that you’re all creative in your own way and that the things you do everyday that you wouldn’t think twice about is art in it’s own way. I’m pumped. Excited. Motivated. Inspired. And I promise we’ll do our best to make the rest of you feel the same way.

I’ll be back in a day or two to post the link to the new site. It may take us a bit to really get in the groove and get the site exactly the way we want it, but I promise you that if you all take the time to transition with us, you won’t be disappointed. More details soon. Pinky swear. But right now, I have shitloads of stuff to do for the launch and I’m going to get my ass fired before I even start if I don’t get it done. So stay tuned. I really don’t think you’ll be disappointed… ;)

Let’s just let the pictures tell the story.

2009-05-11T23:12:00.001-04:00

Since I obviously can’t be trusted or depended on to actually write any content on here these days (which is sad, since I’m often damn hilarious), I’m just going to post lots of photos of the past few weeks in our lives. I’ll be the first to admit that it’s a total cop-out, but I’m cool with that. A picture speaks a thousand words after all, which means I just wrote 15,000 or so of them…

It’s fishing season here. The girls love fishing season.

Hannah continues to let everyone (including the Tooth Fairy) know who’s in charge.

Hannah’s dance recital is coming up soon.

We’ve all been doing lots of reading lately.

I made exploding photo boxes for Mother’s Day. Looks like a box, but when you take the lid off, the sides “explode” to reveal several layers of photos.

My girls get more beautiful by the day. :)

More later. I’m off to watch tonight’s “House.” :)

OK. So I suck AND I lie.

2009-04-23T00:33:00.001-04:00

So much for crossing my heart and hoping to die after that last post. Obviously, I’m a big fat liar. LOL!

ANYWAY, I’m here now. I’m not really sure how I ended up here, since I was doing other things, but here I am, so let’s update, shall we? [enter bulleted list]

(If you do not want to read the bullets, the brief summary of this post is that I got laid off, I’m not running anymore but still exercising, I can read, I like psychics, I still take lots of photos, pig roast planning has begun, I like free shit, and I’m a sucker.)

* I got laid off a few weeks ago. Most people are upset when this happens to them, but in my case, I was thrilled! I didn’t really like the job, (most of) the people annoyed the shit out of me, and I had no CLUE who was going to take care of my children over the summer. Now I can take care of my children over the summer and I can collect the same amount I was making at the job, so it’s ALL good. :)

* The Couch to 5K program is dead in my life (may it RIP). My knees were just WAY too excruciatingly painful for me to keep it up. But I’m taking some stuff to try to rebuild that cartilage (so I can start again), and for now, I’m running on our elliptical everyday. I’ve found that being able to read a book while exercising makes exercising MUCH more bearable. ;)

* Speaking of reading, I’ve finished three complete books in the past week and a half. I haven’t read ONE full book in about 5 years, so this is huge! See? I TOLD this being laid off thing is a good thing. ;)

* A few nights ago, Steve and I went to see Lisa Williams live. It was FANTASTIC! And although we didn’t get a reading, we ALMOST did (which sent us both into heart attack mode) and we loved the show all the same. And considering the heart-in-our-throats feeling we had when we thought we were going to get one, it’s probably better off we didn’t this time. LOL!

* I’m still going strong with my Project 365 challenge. I’ve already gone longer than I did last year, so I guess that’s a good thing.

* We’re already discussing this year’s pig roast. We considered just skipping it this year, but a ton of people have started asking us when it is, so we feel sort of obligated. Tink & Hoop better get their asses up here this year! ;)

* I’ve started using coupons. Now, I realize this is something ALL people should do all the time, but I was always too lazy (and too stupid) to do it. But in the past month, I’ve saved over $40 using them. I’ve also managed to snag a ton of free products and free samples just by finding the right websites. I’ve become a bit obsessed with it actually, and play little mind games with myself, trying to outwit, outlast and outplay myself. If there’s a way to get something free or cheap, I WILL find it, dammit! The other week, I scored over $150 worth of Bath & Body Works stuff for around $40, AND I got free lotion at Victoria’s Secret. I also got a free box of organic waffles, a free bottle of detergent, a free tube of toothpaste, and a bunch of free Nature Made vitamins. AND in the next week or so, I can enjoy my free pack of 3 lip glosses from Sephora in honor of my birthday. I fucking RULE!

[What else? What else? Shit. I SWEAR a bunch of stuff has happened lately…]

* I’ve become obsessed with my new facial lotion, but that’s another post for another day.

* I somehow got suckered into taking my friend to her physical therapy three times a week (long story). So now every Monday, Wednesday & Friday while the kids are in school and Steve is working and I could be on Facebook or emailing people or scrapbooking or getting stuff done around the house, I’m instead taking at least 3 (or 4) hours of my day to help a friend. I know all about that good karma shit and all, but it’s getting old. Sigh. But since I’m (sort of) responsible for the surgery that has required her to need the therapy, I feel like it’s sort of my duty to keep taking her. Blech.

I think that’s it for now. I have a bunch of photos I’ll post in the next few days. You know… in between my exercising, slathering on facial lotion, driving to other people’s therapy sessions, and channeling the spirits of people I know that are dead.

Son of a bitch, I suck. LOL!

2009-04-13T23:13:00.001-04:00

Sorry guys. I totally dropped the ball on the blog thing yet again. I’m not sure why I apologize every time. That almost seems a bit self-indulgent, as if all of you are clicking over here every day, upset when there’s no new post. I KNOW better than that, and yet I feel the need to say I’m sorry whenever I haven’t been around for awhile. LOL!

But I PROMISE (cross my heart and hope to die) that I’ll be back in the morning to update on the craziness of my life. Because honestly, even I can’t keep up with it some days lately.

Life is Good

2009-03-21T00:05:00.001-04:00

* I’m still following the Couch to 5K program. Today, I finished Week 2. Steve went with me and we ran along the canal. He got ahead of me, but I expected that. I did it dammit. I’m doing it. I normally don’t finish things I start, so we’ll see how it goes.

* I still don’t have confirmation that my SIL is actually running these days, so for now, I must continue my quest to outrun, outwit, and outlast her. As long as she outweighs me, the universe will continue to function normally.

* I DO, however, had hideous pain in my knees today (and yesterday) though. I’ve had issues with my knees and ankles since I was a little kid, so it doesn’t surprise me. But tonight, cutting off my legs from my knees down to get rid of the incessant aching is something I considered.

* Hannah’s daisies are growing quite well in the little cartons on our windowsill. We all water them and we check daily to see how many new ones have poked through the dirt. There’s something magical about spring and the growth it brings.

* I painted two walls in our middle room today on a whim. I didn’t want to spend money to paint a shitty room with pieced together paneling, so I used the “leftovers” from the greenish color we originally painted our kitchen (and then painted over). The room was just WAY too dark and depressing in it’s dark burgundy color, and I felt the need to change it.

* But I’m sick of painting now and asked Steve if he minded 2 light green walls and 2 dark red ones. He said no, so we’ll see if I finish. LOL!

* Oh. And I ran out of paint, so I hope WalMart can match it with a different paint brand or we really WILL have 2 green walls and 2 red walls.

* I have every intention of bribing Grace tomorrow with a Webkinz or something in order to avoid a bowling party she was invited to. I spent 2 hours in a bowling alley last weekend with Hannah and 20 other 4 and 5-year-olds, and I just think asking me to do that 2 weeks in a row is just wrong. Especially when I have two walls to paint. So I fully intend to use gifts to make her not force me to go. (Don’t you roll your eyes at me. The rest of you with kids want to do the same thing… you just don’t have the balls to actually DO it. I’m an innovator.)

* Of course, Steve won’t be here all weekend for the most part, which means I’m on full-time kid duty. Yeah. Painting those other two walls ought to be a real fucking blast. Sigh.

* I was questioned face-to-face by a person whom I didn’t add as a friend on Facebook. Do people really do that? Confront someone who has rejected/ignored you? Wow. I mumbled some bullshit about not being on Facebook much, but I don’t think she was buying it. Tough shit. I can’t talk shit about her anymore in my status updates if I add her, and, well, what fun would that be?

* I inadvertently became one of the coaches of both Hannah’s t-ball team and Grace’s coach pitch team this spring. I honestly don’t know how it happened, but I’m now committed and I’m not sure if I’m excited about it or if I should start contemplating now how to kill myself with the least mess.

* Steve was also signed up (unbeknownst to him) as an assistant coach for both teams. This means the L-------‘s are going to rule the little league. Watch out, you little shits on other teams, because we’re kicking ass and taking names. When they name the field after us, I’ll let you all know….

I’m going to now finish my beer, hobble upstairs on my bad knees (if I can make it) and crash. Because I’m tired and have painting and shopping and Girl Scout cookie sales, and bribery to deal with tomorrow. That’s enough to exhaust anyone…

Who are you and what did you do with Allison?

2009-03-12T01:27:00.001-04:00

So. I’ve been pondering how to blog about this without feeling like I’ve betrayed myself and the people that know me well. We all know how I feel about exercise. I hate it. I know it’s good for you and all that shit, but I never understood (still don’t) why people willingly make themselves breathe heavy and exert themselves. So it is with deep regret to inform you all that I’ve started doing just that. [hanging head in shame]

It’s something I had been thinking about a lot lately. Not because I wanted to lose weight or be buff or any of those other usual reasons. It was because I was sick and tired of always feeling tired and panicking daily that I was going to perish rather young and leave my 2 gorgeous daughters with a father who, although he tries desperately, just can’t make their hair presentable for school every day.

I gave myself the usual excuses… I’ll start in spring when the weather is nicer… I’ll do it after I quit smoking… I’ll just park in the last spot in WalMart, farthest from the store and walk a bit… etc.

But then, well, that ONE motivator in my life occurred over the weekend. Steve was talking to his brother on the phone. When they hung up, Steve laughed and said mentioned that his brother said he had to hang up because the kids were wild and “Jen is out for her run so I have to reign them in.” Jen? Running? On a regular basis? Son of a bitch! We ALL know how I feel about my SIL. Although there are no obvious issues between us anymore, I know that secretly, we’re still fiercely competitive. There is no way in HELL I’ll EVER let her be in better shape than me (which isn’t saying much) or thinner than me (something that has never occurred since I’ve met Steve). I mean, can any of us forget when I was told she joined a gym, prompting me to do so? And then, when months later, found out she never joined a gym? ARG! But I have to admit that the last time I saw her (a few weeks ago), she DID look thinner, so I truly believe she’s started running/walking. Dammit to hell.

Anyway, that was enough motivation to convince me to do what I’d be contemplating for the past few weeks. Quite a few of my friends have started the Couch to 5K program, and have had decent success, so I had been thinking about looking into it myself. Once I heard the evil, comma-eyebrow-painting SIL was running, I felt I had no choice. Sigh.

So on Monday, I did it. I followed the Week 1 “rules” and did what I was supposed to. I didn’t cheat. I didn’t walk when I was supposed to be running. And I DID it, dammit! I was so proud of myself! I smoke about 1/2 pack a day and drink WAY more than any person should, and yet, I completed Day 1. I hate to admit it, but towards the end of it, I was ready to pack it in, but found that if I just chanted, “Jen. Jen. Jen…” every time my foot hit the ground, I could muster through it.

So today was my second day (you do it every other day), and it was a bit easier. My legs were much more forgiving, but it was colder, so breathing was a bit harder. But I DID IT! I didn’t cheat at all and I did what I was supposed to do. Steve’s proud. My mom was asking me about it. And my Facebook friends have been nothing but encouraging. But most importantly, I’M proud of myself. Exercise and I are not friends, so the fact that I’m pushing myself does give me a bit of pride.

And I won’t lie…. come this summer, when the family’s all at my FIL’s house to swim in his pool and I can rock my bathing suit better than my SIL, I’ll smile to myself and inwardly thank her for being a bitch, which is what motivated me to do what I needed to do anyway. Ahhh… life is good….

I’ve decided that tomorrow, I’m going to take a “Before” photo of myself and post it so I can show the “After” as I go along on the program. It’s NOT something I really wanted to do, but at the same time, I like to take comfort in the fact that I’m extremely comfortable with who I am now. I really am! It’s me. Take me or leave me. If you don’t like it, don’t look. And I think it will be fun (and motivational) for me to post a photo at the end of each week or two and see what I look like at the end of the 9 weeks.

Again, I’m not doing it to lose weight. I’m more than happy with the number that shows up when I step on a scale. But the distribution of that weight (HELLO butt, stomach and thighs) could probably use a little work, so we’ll see how that changes as I continue the program.

So sit back and enjoy the ride. I figure that even if you have no interest in the exercise portion of it, at least I can keep you entertained with half naked photos of myself and updates on the comparisons between myself and my SIL. Because I KNOW you all have that ONE family member that you feel the need to better than. Don’t lie. You do. You just don’t want to admit it…

Could it be?

2009-03-08T09:08:00.001-04:00

Could it be that spring is finally here? Yesterday was GORGEOUS! We spent the entire day outside. Now I’m not so naive as to think we won’t have any more cold weather (it’s supposed to go back down to 40 later this week). But yesterday was awesome and a little teaser for what’s coming (hopefully) soon.

So we donned short-sleeve shirts and we ran:

And we fed the birds:

And we explored:

And we sat:

And we had a few meltdowns:

And we got wet and muddy feet:

And we drove the lawnmower:

And we played ball:

And it was a fantastic day. :)

Hey gang.

2009-02-15T19:45:00.002-05:00

Sorry I haven’t been around. I swear, I feel like we’re all on full speed ahead here with no time to rest. Unfortunately, I don’t see a break anytime soon, so we’re just plugging along. Just lots of work stuff, extracurricular stuff for the girls, birthday parties, etc. and we’re all moving from morning ‘til night. I’m anxiously awaiting a day where we have NOTHING to do, but looking at our calendar, I don’t see that happening anytime soon.

I hope everyone had a nice Valentine’s Day! We don’t really celebrate V-Day, so we didn’t do anything exciting, but it turned out to be a big day for both L------- girls anyway.

So last week, Grace failed her eye exam at school. I had her eyes checked just a few months ago, and that eye doctor swore her vision was fine, so I was a little surprised when she brought the paper home from school. So I decided to take her somewhere else this time, and scheduled an appointment for yesterday at the Lenscrafter in the mall.

So we get to Grace's eye appointment, the doctor uses his fancy machines to check her out and tells me she's 20/30 in her right eye, and practically legally blind in her left eye! WTF!?!? My heart dropped, and I tried to remain calm so as not to freak Grace out. I told him I had JUST had her to the eye doctor in October and that guy had said she was 20/20 and 20/30! He said it's possible she got bad that fast (growth spurt, etc.), but you could tell he was pretty sure the first eye doctor had fucked up. WTH?

So he says he wants to put drops in her eyes which will fully dilate her pupils for 24-48 hours, making bright light really uncomfortable for her and basically meaning she'll have blurry vision for at least a day, if not two, but allowing him to get her EXACT prescription for the glasses she definitely needed. The poor kid. She didn't care that she needed glasses, but once she started having the blurry vision, I could tell she was REALLY upset and freaked out. She remained calm on the outside, but was absolutely overwhelmed. She was also upset because I told her there was no way she could go to her playdate when we got home if she couldn't see. I think that’s why she was so upset to be honest with you.

So before her vision went completely blurry, we quick picked out an adorable pair of purple-ish/burgandy frames that look FANTASTIC on her. And I mean REALLY cute. Once her pupils were dilated, he rechecked her and it turns out her right eye is 20/30, and her left eye is freakin' 20/100. Sigh. She was pretty freaked out for the hour we waited while they made her glasses (since she still couldn't see right), but once we all ate lunch, watched Hannah get her ears pierced (more on that in a minute), and walked around the mall for a bit, she could start seeing a little better and cheered up. We went back to pick up her glasses and she was really excited to get them and get her cute little pink case that has handles like a little purse. :)

By the time we were coming home, I decided she was seeing well enough again to go to her playdate after all, so I dropped her off as soon as we got home.

So she'll need her glasses for distance (chalkboard, whiteboard, watching TV and movies, etc.), but not for close up reading, etc. She's actually excited about them now, which is great.

It was just an emotionally draining day for us. It KILLED me to see her so freaked out, depressed, etc. for that hour or two, knowing I couldn't really fix it. But all is well now, and she's got her glasses and is good to go. But when a mother hears the words “legally blind” it kind of freaks you out, ya know?

She’s doing well with them. She’s had a slight headache here and there since getting them (which is normal), and she’s sore behind her ears a bit, but all in all, they haven’t given her any problems.

So here she is, looking fantastically cute in her new glasses. :)

Like I mentioned, Hannah also decided to get her ears pierced. She looks SO cute and didn't even flinch! :) I’m actually surprised it took her this long to get them pierced. I’ve been asking her for a year or so if she wanted them done, and she said no. But yesterday, apparently, she decided it was time. So she picked some pretty blue earrings, sat down, and got it done. LOL!

So that was our Valentine’s Day. I hope yours were all a bit more romantic. LOL!

For My Dear, Sweet Tink :)

2009-02-13T16:51:00.001-05:00

I had to crop it oddly to post it here because she wrote “The [our last name]s” at the bottom and I didn’t want to post it here. But you get the idea. :)

Project 365 Layouts – Weeks 3, 4, and 5

2009-02-09T13:27:00.001-05:00

Ugh. I suck at blogging lately. But we have been SO busy. Between snow days, me commuting to the office again, a bunch of illnesses right after the other, and normal everyday stuff, my head is swimming. LOL! For a summary of the past few weeks, read the layouts below. (LOL!)

I’ll be back with a REAL post soon! I swear!

Week 2 Layouts for Project 365

2009-01-21T10:34:00.001-05:00

Here’s one of my layouts for week 2.

I really like the way week 1 and week 2 look next to each other (which is how they’ll be in the photo book I plan on printing at the end of the challenge).

I also decided to use the free downloads from Becky Higgins to make layouts each week that allow me to make the photos a bit bigger and journal a bit more. Here are my first two weeks:

Quick update post…

2009-01-21T00:33:00.002-05:00

Hey gang. Sorry I haven’t been around. So much has been going on lately and it’s been hard to get here to blog. Sigh. We’re going to do one of my infamous bulleted lists now, because it’s just easier for me…

* Good ol’ Jen Wilson, (of Jen Wilson Designs), whose Creative Team I’m on, has refound her mojo, and is cranking out new products like it’s her job. Oh, wait. It IS her job. LOL! We have chats in the site’s chat room every Monday and Wednesday night now. I LOVE the chats, but it’s just one more thing that keeps from blogging here. (Which is totally cool with me… just trying to explain my absence….)

* I’m still going strong with Project 365 and have finished week 1 and 2’s layout. I’ll post those later.

* This past Sunday was HUGE in that “our team”, the Steelers won the game and made it to the Superbowl. We are SOOO effing excited it’s not even funny!! Is it February 1st yet? Black and gold, baby! Black and gold!

* Steve and I have been rocking it in terms of married life. (Don’t be gross… that’s NOT what I meant.) What I meant is that we just rule in terms of a couple and although most winters when he’s around so much, I get annoyed, THIS year, we’re like pigs in shit. I seriously don’t know what I’d do without the guy, and I only hope my kids grow up to be as happily married as we are. :)

* I’ve made some very general resolutions for this year. Nothing crazy like quitting one of my many addictions. But I kind of “lost” the old me for a few years there. I’m normally a total spaz, laughing at everything, happy as hell, etc. I’m not saying I wasn’t happy before, but I had been letting the stress of everyday life get in the way of just enjoying everyday life. So I’ve been spending more time with the kids (and less time on the computer while they’re awake), laughing more, being more laid back, yelling WAY less at the kids, and rediscovering the gift of patience that seemed to disappear a few years ago. I must say, so far I’m kicking major ass and taking names. And it feels GOOD, dammit. :)

* I’ve been attempting (in spurts) to get this house under control in terms of the clutter. Last weekend’s project was the basement playroom and I kicked some major ass. I’m so sick and tired of random crap in the house, and slowly but surely, I’m enjoying the purging.

Other than that, everything’s been pretty much the same. LOL! I’ll drop in as much as I can, but with all of the changes in our normal daily schedule, that’s proven to be a bit more difficult lately. But we’ll all soon fall into the new routine, and life will balance out a bit more. :)

Days 3, 4, and 5

2009-01-07T08:47:00.001-05:00

I’ll be back later with a real post, but I wanted to get my Project 365 photos on here for days 3, 4, and 5. Lots to talk about later!

Random Thoughts

2009-01-04T23:48:00.002-05:00

Tonight’s post is going to be another ramble. And let’s face it, we all love bulleted lists. Oh wait… maybe that’s just me…

* I loved that the Eagles won today. Although I’m a converted Steelers fan (thanks Steve!), I’ll always have a place in my heart for the Eagles. I still remember my Ron Jawarski jersey from childhood.

* I hope the Superbowl ends up a Steelers vs. Eagles game. Not for any reason other than that it would be cool to have two PA teams in it, the rivalry among friends and family would be priceless, and I’m curious to see which way my loyalty would sway. (I’m all about testing my inner self.)

* My kids’ sleep schedules are all SORTS of screwed up after the holiday break. I’m dreading this next week as I try to get them back on track.

* It was awesome last night to have various friends and their kids stop by to visit. We had six kids here that were ages 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, and 7 and consisted of 2 girls (ours) and 4 boys (other people’s). Hey, we like excuses to drink, and if that wasn’t a reason to, nothing is.

* It did make me reflect on how it is that EVERYONE we know has sons. Every single one of ‘em. Our poor girls. Not that they seem to mind, but a little girl wandering in here for a play date now and then would be nice.

* I spent HOURS yesterday undecorating and dissecting our Christmas tree for removal from our home. Steve wasn’t here and I couldn’t drag it out by myself, so I used a hand saw to cut it apart branch by branch and throw it outside. The pictures are priceless and I’m still smelling pine every time I breathe in. I’ll post the pictures tomorrow sometime.

* I think our friends Matt & Joy could possibly have the cutest and most well-behaved boys I’ve ever seen in my life. I’d totally adopt both of them tomorrow and think nothing of it. It gave me hope that all boys don’t act like my nephews. (And we should ALL be thankful for that.)

* I’m sad though that Matt & Joy currently live in Texas and we can’t hang out more often. WHY do all of the people I like the most live so far away? Is God punishing me? Do people purposely move away from me? Are we only likeable from afar? LOL! It’s anybody’s guess, but it really sucks sometimes.

* I’m looking forward to next Sunday when the Steelers play the Chargers. Our friend Jim (a Chargers fan) and his wife and kids are coming over, and Steve and I are already plotting to decorate the entire home in Steelers paraphernalia to annoy him, right down to putting a Steelers hat on the bear in our living room. Because we’re sweet like that. I’d rather bleed black and gold than powder blue and yellow. ;)

* I also hope that Jim’s wife, Kelly, realizes that when it comes to football, I may as well be a guy and that she’s totally in charge of watching the four kids while they’re here. Dude, I do NOT miss a single play of a Steelers game. Our girls know that when a Steelers game is on, they’re on their own for a few hours, so as far as I’m concerned, her boys are too unless Kelly decides to pay attention to them. If she chooses not to accept that challenge, then all injuries/issues/etc. are on her conscience. She’s been warned. (And for the record, they invited themselves here. We have no problem with that and enjoy when they come to visit… but if she thinks for one second that her and I are going to play with the kids while the guys watch the game, she’s sadly mistaken and is in for a rude awakening. LOL!)

* I’m in serious need of a haircut and color, but have no clue when I’ll find the time to get in for an appointment.

* I used an Amazon gift card for Xmas to buy a remote control for my camera. This means many more self-portraits and ridiculously dorky photos. Aren’t you excited? YAY!

And with that, I’m off to bed. I’m exhausted after our whirlwind week and really need to get some sleep. I don’t WANT to go to bed yet, but if I don’t, you’ll all be submitted to more of these rambling, exhausted posts from me and I don’t want to continue punishing you all like that. ;)

G’night!

Day 2/365

2009-01-03T10:30:00.001-05:00

Trying Again…

2009-01-01T22:29:00.001-05:00

Well, I’ve decided to set myself up for failure yet again and attempt Project 365. I SO admire those of you that started it in 2008 and actually finished it. I could post all sorts of excuses as to why I stopped doing it 90 days or so into it, but the bottom line is that I didn’t finish it. So I’m determined to actually make it through all of 2009. I may fail again, but at least no one can say I didn’t try, right? LOL!

So here it is. My first photo for Project 365 – 2009. It’s Grace playing our Hannah Montana game for the first time on the Wii. I hate to admit it, but it’s a hell of a lot of fun and all of us love it. (Well, except maybe Steve. He didn’t see us playing it. But I wouldn’t be surprised if I came downstairs in the middle of the night one night and caught him busting a move.)

I’ll probably post most of my photos here on this blog as I go, but I also started another blog dedicated only to the Project 365, where I have no intentions of posting anything other than the photo every day. You’re all more than welcome to add that blog to your blog readers, check it out here and there, etc. You can find that here. I’ll make a fancy blog header and all that later, but for now, I just wanted to get things rolling. :)

And so begins…

2009-01-01T01:22:00.001-05:00

…a new year. My New Year’s Eve was rather uneventful actually. We had at least 3 or 4 invitations for parties, but we decided to just stay in (mostly due to the fact that we were exhausted from some Texas friends that came to visit last night and all of us (including the kids) were up past midnight). Steve went hunting today, the kids are sleeping at my mom’s for the night, and Steve & I just decided to lay low.

I spent a few hours editing my Christmas pictures, Steve & I watched some random movies on TV, we quick flipped over to see the ball drop at midnight, and then Steve meandered up to bed and I decided to quick blog before I followed him.

I don’t have too many complaints about 2008. Some here and there, but nothing we didn’t manage to trudge through. We had some scary moments, some heart-wrenching moments, some stressful moments, and some downright depressing moments. But we also had plenty of happy, fun, moving, delightful, and downright ecstatic moments, so I can’t complain. (Well, I could, but what good would it do me, really? LOL!)

I don’t make resolutions because I think they’re just things that people make as a way of trying to convince themselves to make changes that they really should have done regardless of the date or year (and because I never keep them). BUT, I have committed myself (once again) to Project 365, where I’ll take a photo a day for the next year. I was going strong until about March of 2008, and I still blame that on me getting a full-time job again. Pathetic excuse, I know. But I really want to give it another whirl. So we’ll see how it goes.

And there are a few things I’d like to see happen in the next year for us that I won’t go into right now (because I’m tired, I’ve talked about it before, and I’m still not sure what will eventually happen), so we’ll see if all those wishes/desires come true.

And with that, I wish everyone a wonderful, happy, sex-filled 2009. Here are some more photos from our Christmas. Happy New Year everyone! :)

And another Christmas has come and gone…

2008-12-30T00:01:00.001-05:00

So it’s hard to believe it’s all over, isn’t it? How is it that we take months (or weeks… OK, days in my case) to prepare for Christmas every year, and then in the blink of an eye, it’s all over? HOURS spent wrapping presents, only to be torn open within seconds. I often wonder why we all put ourselves through it. LOL!

But the bottom line is that this was possibly my favorite Christmas so far. At least since meeting Steve and having kids anyway. The girls were on their best behavior on both Christmas Eve at my FIL’s house and on Christmas Day here and then at my MIL’s house. After the “Great Thanksgiving Incident”, I think they were afraid for their lives (thanks to Daddy) if they misbehaved, so for once, even though our one nephew ran around like a little tornado and acted like the biggest ungrateful brat in the world, OUR kids remained calm and thankful for all they were given. Ahhh….

Everyone seemed to be in a good mood this year, which as we all know, when lots of family members are all getting together, is no small feat. I got such nice stuff. Steve bought me some really nice clothing, cool gloves (both “regular” gloves and snow gloves… because apparently, my excuse of not being able to come out with them sledding because I didn’t have snow gloves was getting old), and a cool stovetop popcorn maker for the family (since we don’t use a microwave).

My mom had already paid for my new photo printer, but also gave me lots of nice little stuff like candles, body sprays, lotions, soaps, (apparently my house and my body need help in terms of scent? LOL!), and THREE magazine subscriptions. WOOHOO!

My brother and SIL also gave us really nice stuff, like winter & Christmas shaped pasta, Bath & Body Works hand soap, and a gift card for each of us (I got Barnes and Noble and Steve got Cabela’s).

My FIL came through again and gave us all a nice present or two along with $100 in cold, hard cash. God, I love that guy. LOL!

Steve’s brother and my evil SIL also did pretty well by giving us each a gift card – mine being for my hairdresser. I’m thrilled since I’m in desperate need of a haircut, but given my past with my SIL, there’s that little part of me that wonders if she was trying to tell me my hair looks like shit. LOL! And I’m still a little confused as to why Steve’s gift card was for Eddie Bauer. A store he’s never shopped at in his life, and the place we often make fun of them for shopping at (0ut loud) since good old Eddie’s pretty plain, average clothing can be bought for half the cost at almost any other store in the world. Perhaps they’re tired of Steve and I dressing like teenagers who live at Aeropostale? LOL! It’s anybody’s guess, but it’s all good. I’m sure he’ll find something there he likes. :)

My MIL actually did REALLY well choosing gifts this year for us, and Steve and I both got really nice clothing, some other stuff, and the softest blanket I’ve ever felt in my life.

The kids, as usual, made out like bandits. They got everything from a Wii (from us), a guitar (from my brother), Wii games (from my sister), new American Girl dolls with accessories (from my parents), and lots of cool craft stuff (from my MIL). Now keep in mind that those were all of the “big” gifts from all of us. That’s not including the other bazillion gifts everyone felt the need to buy them. Sigh.

I still have no CLUE where I’m going to put all of this new stuff. And I’m dreading the after Christmas chores of undecorating the tree and house, taking all of the lights down, etc. But I can’t even complain, because it was such a wonderful holiday this year, that I suppose it’s all worth it.

The Wii is AWESOME! My arm is sore from bowling and playing tennis, and I don’t even complain when Grace asks me to play some games with her. SOOOO much fun and probably one of the best gifts we could have bought them. I see years of use in our future (which is totally unlike most of the gifts they get). Good stuff.

My favorite part of the holidays is always the visitors though. I love that we seem to have totally random people floating into our house in the evenings just to drink a bit and hang out. Steve’s mom and her husband and his aunt and uncle stopped by the other night… we’ve had a few friends drift in… and tomorrow, Steve’s friends since childhood are coming to visit with their two boys. They moved to Texas a few years ago, haven’t been home in years, and we’ve never seen each other’s kids. I talked to the wife tonight and we’re all really excited to get together! :)

Anyway, I hope ALL of you had a wonderful holiday! I’ve barely had time to look at my photos I’ve taken, let alone fix ‘em up to post here. But I’ll try to do that in the next day or two. I do have one or two I can post, but they’re aren’t even remotely exciting. LOL! And, as usual, I’m not in a single photo taken. But I suppose that’s the price you pay when you’re the only one who knows how to work the camera. LOL!

Steve on Christmas Eve at his Dad’s House

Grace on Christmas Eve at my FIL’s House

The Girls Playing the Wii Before My Family Arrived on Christmas Morning

Grace Watching My Brother Playing the Guitar He Gave Her for Christmas

Merry Christmas!

2008-12-24T00:00:00.001-05:00

Hey gang! I’m pretty sure I won’t have a chance to pop in here tomorrow or Thursday, so I wanted to make sure to wish all of you a Happy Holidays! It’s been crazy around here with last minute things. SOOOO much to do and so little time to do it. We host Christmas for my family (around 15 people) here at the house, so on top of the usual Christmas stress of buying and wrapping gifts, I’ve also had to try to fit in cleaning, grocery shopping, and cooking. Not going so well, my friends. LOL!

But we’ll manage. Tomorrow night, we’ll head to Steve’s dad’s house for food, presents, and total chaos with the “spirited” nephews. Then Christmas morning, within 2 or 3 hours of waking up, my family will start to pile into the house with WAY more presents than any child needs. Then it will be a day of eating, drinking, and playing the new Wii that the girls will find under the tree.

Around 3:30 or 4:00, we’ll head to Steve’s mom’s house for more food, gifts, and total chaos with the damn nephews. But we’ll get through it. LOL!

Today was the girls’ last day of school for 15 days (god help me… LOL!), so the teachers’ gifts went with them to school today. I made them each handmade, blank, all occasion cards with envelopes, CD calendars, a Dates to Remember notebook type thing, and a custom box to store everything in. I hope they liked it! The girls said they did, so that’s all I can ask, I suppose. LOL! Here’s what they looked like….

The “Dates to Remember” books:

The CD calendars:

The handmade cards:

Everything tied together to put in the boxes:

And the boxes themselves. The “C” and “K” are their first initials. :)

And with that, I’m outta here. I’ll be back after the holidays with lots of photos, I’m sure, and hopefully, a more “normal” schedule that actually allows me time to post here. Have a great Christmas everyone! :)

Total Drive-By (Again)

2008-12-14T02:49:00.001-05:00

Because it’s 2 AM, and although I’m not even remotely tired, I know I need to go to bed if I have any hope of waking up before 9 AM tomorrow (which is way too late). But this is a good thing. Because it means bullets and we ALL love bullets, right? :)

And we’re off…

* I’ve been so busy, my head is spinning. Work, Christmas stuff, the girls’ extracurricular stuff, school stuff, making gifts, etc. Can someone stop the world please? Because I’d like to get off, if even for just a day.

* My printer took a shit on me 3 weeks ago. It suddenly wouldn’t feed any paper other than normal copy paper. This probably wouldn’t be a problem for most people. But because I print out a lot of photos, scrapbook pages, special papers for hybrid projects, etc., it basically meant my printer was useless to me. So in swoops my mom and buys me the Epson Artisan 700 photo printer as my Christmas gift. Happy, happy sigh. Mom rules!

* However, after printing a bit tonight, using the same double-sided, PrintWorks matte photo paper as a few weeks ago, the new one wouldn’t feed it through anymore either. Uh, I’m thinking it’s the paper, not the printers. So that old printer currently sitting on my living room floor isn’t broken after all? Um. Oops.

* I’m currently a little obsessed with David Cook. Don’t worry. I’m sure it will pass. But for now, I’m a self-proclaimed dork. It’s all good.

* Grace is now officially a Brownie Girl Scout after her investiture ceremony last week. She’s so proud! :)

* Grace is getting a guitar for Christmas from my brother. I think that’s fucking awesome.

* I currently have a total of 3 gifts bought for my children for Christmas, and one of those is a joint gift. (Joint as in for both of them. Not a big bong.) Now granted, the big gift is a Wii. But still. Do you think I could possibly get off my ass and BUY them something? Sigh. My problem is that every other damn family member has already bought them everything they could possibly want or need, so there’s nothing left for me. Dammit. This happens EVERY year.

* I also haven’t bought anything for about 80 other people I need to buy for. I guarantee you I’ll be out shopping on Christmas Eve. I really should have a penis.

* Today ended the 2008 buck hunting season in PA, and I’m sorry to report that my dear husband didn’t shoot one. This is devastating on many levels, and I’m SURE I’ll hear about it for the next year. So if you keep me in your thoughts and prayers, it would be greatly appreciated.

* I’m lip-synching like a rock star right now, thinking I’m all sorts of cool and shit. Yeah Allison… drink another one. [rolls eyes]

* I made some big decisions the past few weeks and I think I finally decided it’s time to move on and forge ahead.

* Hannah continues to crack me up daily. The wit and sarcasm and attitude that comes spewing from that 5-year-old’s lips makes my head spin around (while secretly beaming with pride). She really IS a mini-me, isn’t she? ;)

* Both girls are kicking some serious kung-fu ass in both behavior and grades in school. That’s my girls!

* Grace is student of the month for her class for December. :)

* This Friday, I’m helping out at the school for half the day for some sort of celebration or something (the details are sketchy). The woman who called said it’s “Pajama Day” for the kids and that I, too, am more than welcome to wear my PJs to the school. I have to admit, there’s a very ~~large~~ tiny part of me that wants to walk in wearing something from Frederick’s of Hollywood, like a thong with garters and a bustier. But I suppose that wouldn’t be appropriate, would it? (I’d also have to go BUY garters and bustier, and since I can’t even seem to buy my own damn kids a few Christmas gifts, I’m thinking the chances of me going out and purchasing these items are pretty much slim to none.)

* I know there are about 8 billion other things I wanted to update y’all about, but I’m totally blanking right now. Why is this not surprising?

* Steve’s 34th birthday is on Wednesday and I bought him a kick ass salad shooter. Sounds stupid, I know. But I can assure you he will LOVE it. I don’t think he even knows that such a tool exists. But I will no longer have to listen to his incessant bitching every night when it takes him 45 minutes to make a salad due to the slicing of a billion vegetables (because I’m all about giving people gifts that also benefit me somehow.)

* For Christmas, I got him the mother of all topographical GPS’s. He’s wanted one for quite awhile now for when he goes wandering around the woods. I’m not sure why he thinks he needs one since he knows those woods and mountains better than he knows the home we’ve lived in for almost 10 years, but whatever.

* I never told you guys about “The Great Thanksgiving Incident” involving my kids and our ~~spawn of the devil~~ dear, sweet nephews. I’m not getting into it right now either, because it’s almost 3 AM, but let’s just say that I’m seriously dreading Christmas. I’m thinking of just fleeing the state that week and going down to visit Tink and Hoop. Hell, it’s not like my kids are getting any gifts anyway since I’m suck a slacker. So what’s the difference, right?

And with that, I really need to go to bed now. I need to be up in 4 or 5 hours to shower and pick the girls up at my parents’ house to take them to Sunday School. Later gang. :)

I’ll leave you with a lovely photo of the family when we went to cut down our Christmas tree. :)

(Oh, and while we’re here… isn’t that coat thing Steve is wearing the UGLIEST damn thing you’ve ever seen? I hate it. I tell him it looks like a Bill Cosby sweater. No one else seems to agree with me when asked, but I’m holding my ground on this one. His ~~dickhead friend~~ Grace’s godfather gave it to him because he didn’t want it anymore, so I’m not sure if I hate it because it really is ugly or because it came from Joey, who I have some serious issues with. But either way, I’d like it burned. In fact, I think that’s my New Year’s resolution this year. Burn Steve’s fugly coat thingy. It may be the first resolution I actually keep…)

Tink’s Christmas Meme

2008-12-13T08:34:00.001-05:00

Hey gang! I’m alive! Just extremely busy! Christmas things for the kids for their school and various extra-curricular activities, decorating the homestead, and making lots of Christmas gifts for people. I’ll stop back later with a post of pictures and updates. But Tink made up a Christmas Meme, so I thought I’d at least post that for now.

1. What was the best present you've ever received? *** Probably my engagement ring from Steve. He gave it to me a week early on his birthday (the 17th), but I count it as a Christmas gift. It was awesome.

2. What was the worst? *** Probably the plastic microwave egg cooker from my FIL. You know… as seen on TV. We never even took it out of the box.

3. What is something you really want this year for yourself? ***I got it already, courtesy of my mom. She bought me the Epson Artisan 700 photo printer. Happy sigh.

4. What is something you really want this year for someone else? ***Just for the kids to have a great Christmas. They always do, but I always officially hope for it anyway. :)

5. What's your favorite Christmas memory? ***The candlelight singing of Silent Night every Christmas Eve in church. I have a lot of funny memories of Christmas growing up. But the Silent Night one was one that I knew would happen every year, and it always REALLY put me in the Christmas spirit.

Where I’ve Been.

2008-11-11T12:37:00.001-05:00

Sorry gang. I’m sure you’ve all been checking here to see if I’ve updated lately, right? Uh huh. That’s what I thought. Well, I’ve been busy. And, as per usual, not busy with the things I should be doing, but instead the things I want to be doing.

I signed up for a free online class that Jessica Sprague is offering. The class is called “Stories in Hand”. It started yesterday and registration for it was closed last night. But those of us that did sign up are having a blast! No one was even really sure what the class was about. Jessica simply said she was going to teach us the system she developed for telling her stories, organizing her thoughts, etc. It sounded intriguing and it was free, so I figured what the hell.

I’m SO glad I signed up! It’s fantastic! We had been given a list of a few supplies before the class started, so I had picked those up last week. Yesterday, for the first day, we were given files to print out for the cover and the tabbed pages for the binders we had bought. Here’s the cover:

And here are the tabbed pages we printed out and put into the binder. There’s one for “Roots”, one for “Self” and one for “Family”.

This is what they look like:

Within the Family tab, she told us to create sub-tabs for each member of our family. So I have one for Steve and one for each girl:

So that was it for day 1 of the class. Today, I got very excited when I saw what the next part was. We were given more files to print out for in the binder. And on these files are hundreds and hundreds of questions to ask yourself and then write/scrap/video/etc. about. Whatever way we decide to document it is up to us. The class is more about teaching us how to keep track of what we want to document, prompts for possible things that will be forgotten if someone doesn’t write them down, etc.

These are the contents and questions we were given for each of the tabbed sections:

There are at least 20 pages of those questions for EACH tab. My god, I’ll be writing and scrapbooking forever. LOL! I’m sooo excited though! I really DO think it’s important to document the things in your life. The things that will be long forgotten after your gone unless someone takes the time to record it forever. Think of how cool it will be for my kids to have the stories behind these types of questions. I wish I had one of these from my mom!

Jessica also gave us these pages to print out for the binder:

We were told to put at least one of those in each tabbed and sub-tabbed section, to write down the stories you want to eventually document. So cool!

I’m not sure what we’re doing tomorrow, but I believe Jessica mentioned making a small notebook or something. After that, we’re going to begin actually using the system, doing exercises, etc. I’m pretty pumped! I wish I would’ve posted about the class here before registration was over so some more of you could have signed up. It’s NOT for scrapbookers. There’s certainly a lot of us there, but many haven’t scrapped a day in their lives. The pages and files are as easy as clicking Print, cutting them down, and punching holes in them. So no comments here about me being creative. This is ALL Jessica this time. LOL!

If she ever offers this class again in the future, I’ll make sure to post about it here and I URGE all of you to sign up for it. Even if you don’t want to actually scrap/write/etc., it’s cool just having the hundreds of questions at your fingertips. I can see it being fun for your kids to pick one of the questions and let you tell them the story. Just awesome stuff.

Anyway, that’s where I’ve been the past few days. Printing, cutting, and punching holes. I’ll be back later though. I NEED to post the photos of my evil sister-in-law and my mother-in-law sliding down the ginormous slide at Bounce U over the weekend. Their facial expressions are simply priceless. LOL!

Later gang! :)

Year at a Glance Album

2008-11-07T15:38:00.001-05:00

As mentioned yesterday, my custom deck of cards from Artscow arrived last week. There’s an option to turn off the numbers from printing on the cards. Since there are 52 cards in a deck, I thought it would be fun to upload a picture from each week for the past year and have them put on the cards. Then I had Steve drill a hole through the whole deck and I held them together with a standard office binder ring. (Note: I’ll be buying a smaller ring. This was just the only size I had in my stash right now. I’ll also tie some ribbons and stuff on the ring to “pretty it up”.

I had uploaded a design to put on the backs of all of the cards, so I just took a Sharpie marker and wrote a little bit about each photo on the back of them.

In Photoshop, I put a little “strip” on each photo and typed “Week of _______”.

It’s been fun so far. Just looking at it this week, we discovered that during this week last year, there was some snow on the ground. Far cry from the almost 70-degree day we’re experiencing today. LOL! The girls get a kick out of it and we end up talking about the picture and some stories from whatever event the picture is from. Good stuff. :)

And once again, I disappeared.

2008-11-06T15:35:00.001-05:00

Wow. I’m really slacking on this blog thing. I think it’s partly because I’ve spent most of my time over on Facebook again [waving to Facebook friends], partly because work has been busy (when I decide to actually work, that is), and I’m working on a bunch of projects for Christmas and stuff. I seem to have missed Halloween AND the big election here. Wow.

OK. So let’s start with a few photos of the kids on Halloween. I don’t have many of Grace because she decided she didn’t want to go Trick-or-Treating, so I only have the one of her on the day we tried out her costume idea (for now… I have some others of her I haven’t edited yet). She went to a bunch of other Halloween-related parties, events, etc., so when she didn’t want to trick-or-treat, I didn’t push her.

So here’s Grace. She’s a punk rocker.

Don’t you just love the attitude? LOL! (And obviously, when we went out in public, she wore a different shirt that didn’t bare her midriff.

And now, onto my little Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. She had a BLAST trick-or-treating!

This was the day we bought the costume. She had red sparkly shoes for the Halloween events. See? She had to wear many, many layers because it was freezing, but you could still tell who she was supposed to be, so she didn’t care.

In other news, I got my Deck of Cards mini photo album thingamajig the other day and will come back later to show you pictures of that. It turned out pretty cool if I do say so myself!

And now, I need to enjoy the last 15 minutes before the girls come bounding through the door from school. So I’ll be back later!

OH! And I have to show you why my children have reaffirmed that they are indeed mentally disturbed freaks. LOL!

Um, hello?

2008-10-29T11:05:00.001-04:00

Hey gang! I can’t believe it’s been 9 days since I last blogged. How very rude of me. In my defense, things have been pretty busy here with work, Halloween events, switching our house’s heating system from oil to coal (for purely financial reasons), school stuff, and extracurricular activities. But I’m here now, which is all that matters, right?

In glancing at my last post, I see I never posted my Sunday layouts for my Week in the Life project. So here they are for your viewing pleasure, as well as the 2 inside pages that sort of act like a pictorial “summary” of the week.

I just have to do the cover page and maybe one or two “outtake” pages, and then I’ll get it printed.

What else? Oh! I’m a redhead now! I went last Friday and got my hair done. It less “orange” (actually, it’s not orange at all IRL) and more “auburn” in real life, but you get the idea. I LOVE it and may never go back to another color. :)

And yes, in the photo, I’m holding my shirt shut to avoid boobie flash. I had to use my self-timer and because it was sitting on our low windowsills, I had to sit on the floor and bend over. LOL!

Anyway, I need to go do some work now, but I’ll be back later. Tonight is trick-or-treat night in town (and no, I do NOT know why my town does it on the Wednesday before Halloween, but they do). So I’ll post some pictures of my little Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz and my punk rocker/goth girl. Later gang!

Weekend Report

2008-10-19T14:34:00.001-04:00

So the weekend’s been busy, but fun, I suppose. Friday night was “Movie Night” here, so we made ice cream sundaes and watched “Finding Rin Tin Tin” (cute movie, by the way). Yesterday, I cleaned during the day and then we headed to the town’s Halloween parade. Grace walked with her Brownie troop again, and I walked with Hannah and her Daisy troop. They made me wear a stupid headband and a tail, but I shoved the tail into my back pocket about 2 blocks into the parade. I have some pride. And since the entire damn town watches the parade and I know over half of them, I had to draw the line somewhere. LOL!

I’m waiting for Steve to get home from walking around on a mountain somewhere so we can order wings and watch the Steelers game I’m taping right now. I’m soooo tempted to turn it on and at least see who’s winning, but I’m fighting the urge. Sigh.

Anyway, I have some more cleaning up to do, so here are my pages from the last few days for my Week in My Life project. I’ll be back later. :)

I doubt you want to see ALL of these pages close up, but I will post the last two larger so you can see little Hannah has a cat. Unfortunately, since I was with Hannah for the parade, I didn’t get any photos (except that one) of Grace.

Halloween has officially begun.

2008-10-16T11:54:00.001-04:00

Last night, Grace was in a Halloween parade in a neighboring town. She walked with her Brownie troop. The girls were jellyfish and their leader was Spongebob. I must say, their costumes were really creative and they looked really cute! They had umbrella hats and they attached strips of bubble wrap, colored cellophane, and some iridescent charms. They each wore a blinking, color-changing light around their neck and had different colored glow sticks in the umbrella hats. They looked really neat walking in the dark.

Grace had a blast! It was her first parade she was ever in. Hannah sat with me and Steve to watch it and loved getting all the candy that the parade marchers threw to the kids along the street. (Are we the only people that do that? It’s a big thing around here for all parades, and the kids LOVE it.

This Saturday is our town’s Halloween parade. Grace is in it again and Hannah is also in it with her Daisy troop. I’m walking in the parade with Hannah, although I don’t really want to. LOL!

I’m working on another little album project too. At Artscow, you can order a deck of photo cards, with a different photo on each card. I recently discovered that you can set it so that the actual card numbers and suits aren’t printed on the cards. Since there are 52 cards in a deck and 52 weeks in a year, I uploaded one photo from each week for the past year and put one on each card. Then I turned off the card numbers for printing. When I get them, I’ll somehow bind them (probably with a ring) and have a little album of a picture a week for a year. I’m excited to get them! I just need to create the “cover” card and then I can order them. Once I get them and see if the whole concept actually works, I may order another set or two for Christmas gifts for the grandparents.

And now, I must go do something productive. Here are my pages from yesterday for my Week in My Life project. Grace is on the right-hand side of the photo, holding the banner. :)

Life Happens. And I Want to Remember It.

2008-10-15T00:36:00.001-04:00

I started a new “project” yesterday. For what it’s worth, this project wasn’t my idea. I first read about it on Ali Edward’s blog. She’s an amazing person (from what I gather) and an amazing scrapbooker (from what I’ve seen). A few week’s ago, she posted about a Week in the Life project, where you document a week in your life. No pressure of Project 365 where you’re committed for a year. No reason to try to be overly creative or impressive. Just recording what a week in your life is like. Take photos for a week, write a bit about them and be done. Seven short days to do it, but something you (and others) can look back on for the rest of your lives and smile, cry, reflect, etc.

So I decided yesterday to give it a whirl, and I have to say, I’m having a blast with it. I took photos yesterday and today and spent the majority of today deciding what I wanted my finished book to look like, what I wanted to do (and not do) with the whole thing, etc. I decided from the get go that this wasn’t going to be crazy ADHD about the photos (like I normally am). Sure, they’re an important part of the whole thing. But I wasn’t going to spend hours (like I usually do) touching up photos, trying to make them perfect, etc. For me, this is just about getting the details down. I’ve made myself shoot in Auto mode on my camera, just because I don’t want to get all “artistic” with these photos. I’m adjusting exposure, contrast, and white balance in the photos, but that’s where it ends. No fancy post-processing… no touch ups… no cool effects… no mind-blowing conversions. Just the photos and the story behind them.

I think it will be so cool to look back later on and browse through the book I intend to get printed out. In fact, I’m loving it so much, that I think I’m going to do it once a month. One week out of each month, I’ll do this, so that at the end of a year, I’ll have 12 photo books with each one documenting one week during each month of the year. I just think it will be cool to read back through them later.

So I decided to make these fairly simple. No fancy scrapbook elements and drop-shadows, no spending hours making sure all of my colors match, etc. Just a basic template, my photos, and my thoughts.

Here’s what the first page will look like.

Obviously, there’s a second page with the remaining days of the week. I’m just pulling in 4 photos from each day, as a brief “summary” at the beginning of the book.

Then, I’ll have 2 pages for each day of the week. The left side will have one (or two) photos with half a page of journaling just talking about what we did that day, what happened, what kind of day it was, my thoughts, etc. The right side will concentrate on just the photos.

Here are some close ups of the pages.

If you think this might be something you’d like to do, you can go to Ali’s blog and see a whole list of the posts relating to the project. There are so many approaches you can take with this. You can do it digitally like I am. Or you could just print out the photos, crop them, and handwrite the story behind them. In my opinion, the appearance of the end result isn’t nearly as important as the process and the idea behind the end result. I just think it’s a cool concept, and one that I think the kids (and Steve and I) will really enjoy as they get older and can look back on our lives.

So who’s joining me? Anyone? If you decide to give it whirl, drop me a line and let me see your project. I LOVE look at everyone else’s. :)

And the hook brings you back…

2008-10-11T00:39:00.001-04:00

The title has nothing what-so-ever to do with this post, but “Hook” by Blues Traveler happens to be streaming on my computer, so we’re rolling with it. See how creative I am? I deserve some sort of award or something. For real. If any of you have a creativity award out there to give me, I think I deserve it. I mean, seriously, when was the last time you saw such a creative blog post title? <--- Total sarcasm here people.

So what’s everyone up to? <--- This is another hint I don’t have much to talk about. When I start asking my readers “what’s up” as if they’re sitting in the same room as me, ready to answer, it means I’m just wasting time and filling up some space with meaningless words. Not that I don’t care what’s up in your lives. I just don’t think anyone will actually bother to comment here just to tell me what’s up.

I’m actually almost ready to fall asleep, surprisingly enough (12:12 AM is early for me in terms of a bedtime), so this won’t be long (or so I say now…).

Thanks to everyone who took my poll. I have to say, I’m a bit surprised by the results. I didn’t expect it to be so close, because frankly, I thought Obama would “win” here. What the hell are conservatives doing here reading this blog? I mean, I’m actually a registered Republican, was in the Young Republicans Club in college, was on Governor Ridge’s campaign committee and attended his inaugural ball, etc. But the truth is, that I’m always pretty much smack dab in the middle. There are certain issues where I lean to the right (I know… I know… shocking.), and certain issues where I lean to the left. I posted the poll because I, honest to god, have no clue who I’m voting for yet. I tend to sway back and forth, and will probably walk into the voting booth, close the curtain, and then decide who I’m voting for (just like the last 2 presidential elections). So the poll was partly because I can still be swayed either way, but mostly because I’m curious. I posted the same poll on some internet boards I post on, and honestly, on all of them, the results are pretty close between Obama and McCain. I’m not really sure why this surprises me. It just does.

But moving on…

I know I said it the other day, but I swear that this weekend, I’m going to post about all of the cool applications, Firefox extensions, etc. that I’ve installed that I’m pretty sure have me bordering being called a total computer geek. But they DO make my life on the computer easier and faster, so I guess I’ll wear my “Geek” badge with pride. :D

And with that, I’m out of here. I just wanted to swing by and say hello. I’ll post a few photos for you from last week’s pumpkin patch trips. You know… because I’m sure that’s why you came here, isn’t it? [rolling eyes]

Hannah and Grandma (my mom) Sharing a Funnel Cake (PLEASE tell me the rest of the country has funnel cakes. Because if you don’t, you have NO idea what you’re missing out on.)

Queens of the Mountain The girls on top of some hay bales at the pumpkin patch. (I am well aware this photo is WAY over-processed and over-worked, but I was bored and avoiding working, so deal with it.)… (And yes, their size difference still amazes and amuses me on a daily basis. They’re only 2 years apart (almost to the day), but you’d swear Grace was a good 3 or 4 years older. Totally cracks me up.)

Not-So-Scary Cheetah (Or leopard? How the hell DO you tell those two cats apart, anyway?) Grace with her face painted at the pumpkin patch.

“See” you tomorrow gang. I’m heading to bed. G’night!

Please take this for me…

2008-10-08T14:11:00.001-04:00

Thank you, my dear friends. :)

(For those of you that use a feed reader, there’s a poll embedded in this post I’d really appreciate y’all taking.)

Cookie Tray Template

2008-10-08T08:39:00.001-04:00

For those of you that have been asking, I apologize for taking so long to put these together. But here they (finally) are. The templates (.psd and .tiff) for the cookie tray chart I made a few weeks ago. Enjoy! And if you create one yourself, I’d love to see them! :)

You can download the templates here.

Chelle made me do it…

2008-10-07T16:33:00.001-04:00

1. Where is your cell phone? Charging
2. Your significant other? Steve
3. Your hair? straight
4. Your mother? saint
5. Your father? protective
6. Your favorite thing? kids
7. Your dream last night? none
8. Your favorite drink? beer
9. Your dream/goal? wealthy
10. The room you’re in? living
11. Your fear? midgets
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? here
13. Where were you last night? soccer
14. What you’re not? disciplined
15. Muffins? chocolate
16. One of your wish list items? lens
17. Where you grew up? Pennsylvania
18. The last thing you did? smoked
19. What are you wearing? jeans
20. Your TV? Nickelodeon
21. Your pet? none
22. Your computer? Dell
24. Your mood? good
25. Missing someone? John
26. Your car? Accord
27. Something you’re not wearing? coat
28. Favorite Store? Aeropostale
29. Your summer? fast
30. Your favorite color? blue
31. When is the last time you laughed? today
33. Who will/would re-post this? Geena
34. FOUR PLACES I GO OVER AND OVER: living room, basement, Girl Scouts, soccer games
35. Four Foods I Like: steak, chicken, cheese, pasta
36. FOUR PLACES I WOULD RATHER BE RIGHT NOW: Home (for good tonight), couch, Florida, restaurant

It’s that time of year…

2008-10-07T12:23:00.001-04:00

That time of year when the kids are in 8 billion extra-curricular activities and we have someplace to be or somewhere to go every night of the week AND on weekends. And then there’s the usual family fall stuff, like pumpkin patches, preparing for Halloween, etc. As much as I love this time of year, it also completely exhausts me. LOL!

That being said, it was a really busy weekend for us. Grace had a 3-hour Brownie hike on Saturday, so my mom and I took Hannah to a local pumpkin patch. The “problem” was that the next day, Grace wanted to go to the pumpkin patch too, so we took both girls on Sunday. We were there for hours both days, and to say that I’ve had my fill of pumpkin patch activities for the year 2008 would be an understatement of huge proportions. LOL!

But at least I got some great photos, right? I didn’t upload the pictures from our day there on Sunday when Grace was along, but I have some from the day just Hannah was there with us.

I’ll post the ones of Grace later. Wait until you see her face painting from that day. LOL! ;)

And yet, in the middle of our craziness this weekend, I managed to get some more layouts done, which is cool.

So I guess that’s it for now. Later tonight, we’ll discuss how I’ve become a TOTAL computer geek in terms of Firefox add-ons. Seriously. It’s become a sickness. Good times, I tell ya…

Later gang!

I’m getting awfully good at this “drive by” thing…

2008-09-30T23:52:00.001-04:00

Sigh. Sorry guys. I swear I’m not trying to avoid you all. I just don’t seem to find the time to get here most days. I swear, it’s like every day seems to fly by. And yet, most evenings, I feel like I’ve accomplished nothing that day. Whassup with that?

Anyway, this is going to be a very quick update post. Let’s see. Since Thursday night when I posted…

** Hannah played soccer in the pouring down rain.

** Grace refused to go to soccer (and I didn’t push it, because I didn’t feel like going either).

** I woke up to find (yet another) piece of one of my teeth in my mouth. (I have really, really bad, brittle teeth that crack at will. Sigh.)

** Made a dentist appointment for tomorrow at noon, where I expect to be told what I was told a year ago by another dentist (which, I can assure you, is not even remotely close to good.)

** Both Hannah and Grace decided to join Girl Scouts. This is now going to involve two separate meetings every Wednesday in two separate places at two separate times. Lovely.

** Hannah’s dance classes also start next week, so y’all know where I’ll be every Tuesday. Lovely.

** Steve and I watched one of the best damn Steelers games we’ve seen in awhile. WOOHOO!

** I won the football pool at work, beating out 17 other people (including my husband). I friggin’ rule.

** Was inspired creatively by a bunch of totally random things, which is always cool.

** Scored a Wii for ~~me & Steve~~ the girls for Christmas. It shipped today. And now I have NO idea how the hell I’m going to be able to wait until Christmas to give it to them.

** Started spreading the word to family and friends that anyone who buys me Rock Band for it will become my new favorite friend or family member.

** Decided I need to start getting more sleep, which is why I’m ending this post now and heading to bed. Later gang.

And you all thought I wasn’t sappy…

2008-09-25T23:54:00.000-04:00

Yesterday marked 9 years that Steve and I have been married. We moved in together about 4 months after meeting each other, got engaged 5 months later, and we were married 9 months after we got engaged. So from the day we met until the day we were married was literally only about a year a half. By today’s standards, that may seem quick to some people. But for us, we just “knew”.

We met in a bar one night. I grew up here where we live now, but was living near Philadelphia at the time in my own apartment. I had been coming home on weekends though to stay at my parents’ house and go out to bars with my sister, who had just turned 21. I walked into the bar and my girlfriends and I kept getting whiffs of cologne. Upon further investigation, we pinpointed that Steve was the wearer of the cologne. My friend, Rosie, went over to talk to him. As soon as I saw him, I knew he was the type of guy I was attracted to. Two hoop earrings in each ear… longish hair… and a smile that lit up the room. Rosie talked to him for about 5 minutes, determined he wasn’t her type, and pulled me over to introduce us. The rest, as they say, is history.

We started talking and didn’t leave each other’s side the rest of the night. It was St. Patrick’s Day weekend, so we did green Jello shots together, chewed tobacco together (shut up… I’ve TOLD you I’m a redneck. And for what it’s worth, neither of us do that anymore. LOL!), and just talked and talked. Before we parted ways that night, Steve asked for my phone number, and having no paper on me, I wrote my name and phone number on a dollar bill. (I still have that dollar bill in my jewelry box in my bedroom).

He called me a few days later and we laughed because he couldn’t read my whole name on the dollar bill. All he could see was “Alli”, so he wasn’t sure what to call me when he called. I swear to god, after that first night, I walked outside at closing time, looked at my friend, and said, “I’m marrying him.” The weird thing is that when Steve left that night, he looked at his friend and said that he was marrying me. Funny how you just “know.”

I’d be totally lying if I said the past 9 years have been perfect. NO marriage is “perfect.” None. But the truth is that Steve and I both agree we have no real complaints when it comes down to it. We’ve had stressful times… hard times… times when we were learning about each other and dealing with it. But none that were so bad that we ever questioned being together. Ever.

The beauty of our marriage is that the longer we’ve been together, the happier we are. This isn’t the case with many of our married friends who throw out comments like, “If it wasn’t for the kids, I’d leave her tomorrow,” and “She’s such a bitch! I never should’ve married her.” Nope. Not for us. Sure, we both have little things we do that annoy the other one to no end. I HATE how Steve leaves damp, used paper towels all over the downstairs. And he hates that I throw my cigarette butts on the side of the house until I pick them up every few days. But we’ve learned to live with each other’s quirks and focus on the good things.

He’s an amazing, understanding husband and father. And as queer and cliche as I know it sounds, he’s my best friend. Some people’s marriages grow stagnant over time, but that’s never happened with us. In fact, I think the longer we’re together, the happier we get. We can finish each other’s sentences. We can read each other’s moods. We know when to push the other person and when to just back off and let the other one sort it out. We know what annoys the other one and try our damndest to not do it (but often fail miserably). Steve knows that after an argument, I need 5 to 10 minutes tops to cool down and then I'm cool with going back to normal with no apologies necessary. I know that Steve just sometimes needs to blow off steam and that the things he’s bitching about have absolutely nothing to do with me or us and that he’ll feel better after just getting it off his chest.

So yes, there are certainly some things you take for granted after being together for an extended period of time. But in our case, time has been nothing but positive. We’re not even remotely stagnant or bored in our relationship. We’re comfortable, which sounds bad, but it isn’t. It’s amazing. Positively, absolutely amazing. Steve, to me, is like that silk blankie or ragged stuffed animal you had when you were a kid. That comfort object that you knew no matter what your day was like, that lovey was going to get you through it. And that when the world was crumbling down around you, you could reach for that object and know that everything would be OK.

So for those of you out there that aren’t married yet or will be soon, please don’t listen to your friends who have grown bored and bitter in their marriages. Because although it certainly happens in some cases, if you’ve found the right person, you’ve found true happiness, regardless of how long you’ve been together. I can say, without an ounce of uncertainty, that Steve and I will be that old, gray couple, sitting on our front porch in 30 years, holding hands and still truly in love. Because I’m lucky enough to have found the person I was truly meant to be with. And that, my friends, is really all I could ever ask for. I’m not a big believer in that whole “soul mate” theory, but I will say that if there was such a thing, then I’ve struck gold and found mine.

Steve is my true love. And as gay as that sounds (and yes, I realize how gay it is to talk like that), I can’t help it. Because he really, truly is the person I was meant to be with….

PS: And so as not to make you think I’ve gone off the deep end, getting all weird and sappy, let me tell you about the anniversary card Steve gave me. Marge and Homer Simpson are dancing together on the front and it says, “With beer and regular bathroom breaks, I could dance with you forever.” The inside says, “Life is good.” LOL! See? He can read me like a book. You’ve gotta love the guy. ;)

PPS: I had every intention of including some of our scanned wedding photos in this post, but never got around to actually scanning them. However, tomorrow is Saturday, which means no work shit to deal with. So I will do just that and post them. Because, well, it’ll be fun. LOL!

Emma Tagged Me…

2008-09-23T17:43:00.003-04:00

The "rules" of the game are as follows:
1. Post the rules on your blog
2. Write 6 random things about yourself
3. Tag 6 people at the end of your post
4. If you're tagged, DO IT and pass on the tag

Okay - six random things about myself...
1) Although part of me would love to be a professional photographer, I really prefer the post-processing in Photoshop more than the actual taking of the photos.

2) I have every intention of upgrading to Photoshop CS4 when it’s released next month, regardless of the fact that I don’t have an “extra” $200 lying around.

3) I’m getting really tired of straightening my hair, so I think I’m going to let it grow out a bit and go back to my natural curls again for awhile.

4) I’ve recently become addicted to Pandora, and am finding tons of amazing new singers (like Brooke Fraser) because of it. (Many of which can be found in my new Playlist in my sidebar over there. –>) Note: If any of you out there are also users on Pandora, let me know so I can peek at your stations, OK?

5) Many days, I would be perfectly happy to not leave my house for weeks, which is the total opposite of how I used to be.

6) If Steve and I weren’t so damn afraid to get on a plane, I’d be going to visit a ton of my friends, including going to an upcoming wedding in Florida that I had the honor of being invited to. Sigh. :(

I'm tagging...
1) Kim (kimmif)
2) Chelle
3) Tink
4) Geena
5) Lisa
6) Melly

Hola gang!

2008-09-22T11:04:00.001-04:00

How was everyone’s weekend? Ours was really busy, actually. “Family Fun Day” for the local soccer club was on Saturday. Steve had to work, so I had the two girls on my own. I was totally dreading it, because it’s a LONG day and I end up dropping about $40 every year. I have to say, the girls behaved WAY better than I thought they would. We had a few moments here and there, but nothing that bad. (Photos from that day later… I didn’t download them off my camera yet.)

Saturday night we headed to my MIL’s just to visit for a bit. It gave the kids something to do right up until bedtime, which was my goal, really.

Yesterday, I spent the entire day cleaning up and organizing the kitchen. Man, did it need it. BAD. LOL! I’m happy to report that every inch of the room has been decluttered, right down to taking EVERYTHING off the front of the fridge (photos, papers, school lunch menus, etc.). It looks fantastic. It won’t stay that way, I’m sure. But I can at least enjoy it for a few days, right?

Other than that, I just spent some time playing around with some photos and scrapping a bit. See? I’ll be back later. Maybe. [shrug]

Credits: Dot Paper: Jen Wilson Designs - Academy – Music; Solid Papers: Jen Wilson Designs - Academy - Elementary Solids; Photo and Paper Overlays: Something Blue Studios; Ribbons: Jen Wilson Designs - Holiday - Laced Ribbons; Pink Ribbon: Jen Wilson Designs - Laundry Line - Unwashed Ribbons; Alpha: Jofia Devoe Designs - Alpha Bead; Green and Pink Flowers - Trish Jones; Glittery Flourish - Trish Jones - Hot Spots – Sparkly; Leaves, Pink and Yellow Flower - Funky Junky Spring Fling - Kate Hadfield

What I Get Paid For…

2008-09-16T14:23:00.003-04:00

OK. Not really. It’s not what I’m supposed to get paid for. But some days, well, other projects “call” and work gets put on hold. Today, I spent the day making a magnetic weekly schedule chart for the girls.

The girls are on different soccer teams, which means games different nights of the week and varying from week to week. And Hannah is constantly asking me "How many more days until my soccer game, Mom?" It's actually sometimes annoying. LOL!

And now that both are in school, I get all kinds of confused about which kid has which “special” class every day (art, music, computers, library & gym). I have to know because on gym days, they need to wear sneakers, and on library days, they need to return their books. And of course, they don’t have these classes on the same day.

AND, just to f*ck with my mind a little more, they also have these classes on a rotating 5-day schedule. That means that as long as they have 5 days of school in a week, we’re golden, and nothing changes from one week to the next. But throw in an in-service or snow day and all hell breaks loose. Why, you ask? Because then when they do go to school that next day, they have the special class that should’ve been the day before and all of the classes shift again. See why I get confused? LOL!

So the bottom line is that I needed some sort of weekly planner type thing that could be changed when necessary without crossing things off on a calendar and creating a big old mess. Enter a cookie tray, some paint, some digital scrapbooking supplies and some peel-and-stick magnets. Put them all together and you’ve got yourself a magnetic weekly schedule planner. Sweet!

This was actually really easy to make. All I did was paint a cookie tray on the bottom. Then I opened up my digital scrapbooking supplies and created the actual weekly “calendar” and the “This Week” header. Those are just printed out on regular matte photo paper and stuck onto the bottom of the cookie sheet.

Next, I created the actual magnets.

I opted to put a photo of each girl on them, mostly because Hannah can’t read yet and I think they’ll get a kick out of it. I also choose to make the picture under each word relate to the event, again, because Hannah can't read. So there are paint brushes for art days, a stack of books for library days, a soccer ball for soccer game days, etc.

For those, I just printed them out on regular satin photo paper, cut them apart, and used a peel-and-stick magnet on the back of each one.

I also created a magnet that says "Today" so Hannah would know each day what's going on for her.

I also created little magnets for other "special events". If you look in one of the top two photos, you'll see a present between the two girls on Sunday. That's because Hannah has a birthday party that day. I also made a tree for Christmas, a bat for Halloween, an "It's Your Birthday!" magnet for, duh, their birthdays, etc.

The best part is that any magnets I don't happen to be using one week can just be stuck on the other side of the cookie tray, out of sight and ready whenever you need them (because otherwise, I assure you, I'd lose them).

So that was it. I figure each Sunday night, the girls can move their magnets around as necessary and they'll know exactly what's going on for the week. :)

Edit: I'm going to make this whole project into templates so those of you with a photo editing program can make your own. We'll offer it up (for free) on Jen Wilson's blog or on her site. I'll post here when we have it up and you can download it and make your own. :)

Tink…

2008-09-12T09:55:00.001-04:00

This, my friend, is hot bologna.

And it’s the best damn thing you’ll ever eat. It’s basically pickled bologna. Sounds disgusting, I know. But I assure you, it’s heavenly. Just heavenly… Mmmmm….

Holy crap!

2008-09-12T01:19:00.001-04:00

Long time, no blog! Whassup with that? I didn’t even realize how long it had been. I don’t even have any good excuses. Yes, we’ve been really busy with school starting, soccer starting (for 2 kids, on 2 separate teams, with no games falling on the same night), open house at the school, homework, my job, etc. But nothing earth-shattering that should’ve prevented me from coming here to at least say hello to all of my fabulous fans. <--- Sarcasm there, people.

Let’s see… what should we talk about. I know! Let’s talk about I finally joined the rest of the free world and called the cable company for a DVR. Dear god, what did I do before this thing came into my home? I’m obsessed. I record TV series like it’s my job. I don’t even care if I don't ever watch them. I just like the comfort of knowing they’re there if I want to watch them. And I can pause live TV. Again, I, for the most part, have no reason to do this. And yet, I sit here pushing the pause button, just because I can. It’s a beautiful, beautiful thing my friends. [happy sigh]

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Let’s see… I’m still obsessed with America’s Got Talent, and Eli Mattson in particular. LOVE the guy. In ways no married woman should. And tonight, he made it into the top 10. And I’m very, very excited about that. (And thanks to the new DVR, have watched the announcement of him making it into the next round about 85 times. Sweet.)

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What else. Ummmm… the digital scrapbooking designer I CT for, Jen Wilson, released a new line tonight. I freakin’ LOVE this line. Just cool, cool stuff. I had the pleasure of getting my grubby little hands on some of it a few weeks ago before it was released and I managed to crank out some layouts WAY faster than I normally do. It’s some good stuff. See?

She’s running challenges with it, which are all detailed in the handbook here. And god bless the girl. Because her challenges ALWAYS make me really think about my layouts, which result in my favorite layouts of all time. That one on the bottom there (the “Our Family Evolution” one) is probably one of my favorite layouts ever. Not necessarily because of the scrapbooking part of it. Just because it has all of the important details of our family on it. It was so much fun to do!

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Um, I think that might be it for tonight. I need to go to bed. I have shitloads to do tomorrow and it’s much easier to do when I have more than 3 hours of sleep. Later gang! :)

Oooo....

2008-09-03T09:05:00.002-04:00

So I stumbled on Blogger's new features! You can now "follow" a blog, (like in Twitter). If you go to your Dashboard, you can add blogs you want to follow. If a blog installs the widget (found in Page Elements in your Layout/Page Elements section, it actually displays those people that have chosen to follow your blog. How cool! Mine's over there. --->

But it's still empty, so can someone follow me please? LOL! And if you add the widget to your own blog, comment here and let me know so I can follow you. :)

AND, you can now add easy buttons to your sidebar so people can subscribe to your posts AND your comments in your posts in their feed readers. Sweet! Go people! Go! ;)

I know I haven’t been around…

2008-09-03T08:57:00.001-04:00

Just been busy and don’t have much to blog about to be honest with you. Later tonight, hopefully. I got a bunch of layouts done over the Labor Day weekend though, which is cool. Here they are. All of these are “scraplifted” from other scrapbookers. That means I basically either use one of their layouts for inspiration, or basically copy it. I’ll post the credits for these later, but I really need to log into work now and get rolling.

And now onto the school pictures…

2008-08-27T00:10:00.001-04:00

On Monday, Grace started second grade and Hannah started kindergarten (ACK!!!)! Both of them (thankfully) were excited to go, so they were both up at 4:30 in the morning, raring to go. Zzzzz….

Anyway, here are some pictures from that morning, while they were waiting for the school bus. :)

I can’t believe I have two school-aged kids! I feel so old! LOL! I’m happy to report though, that they both LOVED their first day, and today went well too. :)

And with that, I’m off to bed with one last beer and a good book. Ahhhh….

I honestly don’t know where to begin…

2008-08-27T00:02:00.001-04:00

So much has happened in the past few days! The pig roast… the kids started school… etc. So we’re going to do multiple posts here. And I’m going to be completely lazy and just copy/paste portions of stuff I’ve already written about each “event” on other message boards, sites, in emails, etc. So some of you have already read this word for word. For that, I apologize. But it’s midnight and I’m tired, so you’re just going to have to deal. LOL!

So here goes. First, we’ll discuss the pig roast. It was our 5th one and I must say, our best so far. We had a TON of new people show up, which was awesome!

The days leading up to it are always busier and more stressful then the day itself. However, it's also when I take more pictures. LOL!

The girls got dirty while Steve built things and I took pictures. LOL!

The day of, we woke up and it was non-stop ALL DAY LONG until people started showing up. Here's Steve pulling the meat off the pig about an hour before the people started arriving.

Here's about a quarter of the people that were there that day. The rest were either in the garage, playing volleyball, playing horseshoes, etc.

And here's Jason. We LOVE Jason. We hired him to sing, but he became more of a friend before the pig roast. Here he is showing us what a freak he is. LOL!

That was one of the last pictures I took that day. LOL! Because right after I took this, Jason started playing. The girls watched him play 3 or 4 songs and were beat, so my parents took them home for the night. That's when I immediately whipped out the beer pong table and started getting my drinking groove on. The next few hours are a blur.

I played a billion games of beer pong, taught two rather old guys how to play beer pong, did shots, almost puked, held it in, told my FIL and step-FIL at one point that I think Steve's brother & the wife only have sex once a month (DOH! LOL!), yelled at the couple that I KNOW had sex in the port-a-potty (Ewwwww!) while also high-fiving them, played Flip Cup, taught another old guy how to play Flip Cup, received a Longaberger tote bag as a hostess gift (YAY for cool guests! LOL!), said a bunch of stupid things, talked to Rory's ex-boyfriend for a good hour asking him what the HELL he was thinking dating her (LOL!), and apparently told everyone that Steve and I are having another baby (although that part is hazy to me). LOL! Oy.

Seriously though, all in all, we had a freakin' BLAST! It's soooo much work, but I think this year it was actually worth it for a change. :)

I will say that I think, after 5 years, Steve and I have finally fallen into a "groove" with our pig roast. We had about 30 or 40 new-comers this year and they all had an absolute blast! I even had my gay hairdresser and his boyfriend here. LOL! If I would've heard one more person say, "There's so much FOOD!" I might have goen ballistic. LOL!

We had the pig (in various different sauces and one with sauerkraut), 3 deep-fried turkeys, potato bacon soup, hot wing dip, pierogies, baked ziti, meatballs, parsley potatoes, a HUGE Caesar salad, about 60 sandwiches on rolls, red beet eggs, brownies, ambrosia, cakes, a huge apple pie on a cookie sheet, macaroni salad, sauerkraut salad, 2 different pasta salads, macaroni and cheese, and about 20 other different foods. It was seriously insane. And what's REALLY insane is that the next day, ALL we had left was some brownies, about 10 sandwiches, and one freezer Ziplock bag of pork. Just crazy. (And no, Steve and I didn't make all that food, but definitely over half of it.)

We kicked 3.5 kegs of beer (halves... not quarters) and lots of people weren't even drinking the beer!

All of Steve's aunt and uncles (some that hadn't come before) were just amazed at what was here. People were showing up with 5 or 6 friends and family members that we didn't even know. And those people left here asking us when next year's is. Steve's one aunt and uncle kept telling Steve's mom afterwards that next year, she's making sure ALL of her (adult) kids come. And how she had no idea how much better it's gotten since 2 years ago (the last time she was at one).

It was just SO much fun! And my god, there is no WAY anyone left here hungry. LOL! I'm glad it was a good one though, because Steve and I were just about ready to call it quits after this one. It is so, so, SO much work to get everything ready. (People seriously have no idea how much time and effort we (especially Steve) put into it.) And people would be shocked to find out how much money we spend on it every year (although this year, quite a few people asked us outright. LOL!). We charged $5.00 a head for the first time this year and still ONLY made enough to cover the pig and the rental of the roaster. Everything else was all on us. And that's fine. But we weren't sure if we were going to do it again.

Now we KNOW we're going to do it again. Because we had so, so many people tell us since this past weekend that they're already lining up babysitters for next year, that we think there would be a riot if we decided not to have it. LOL!

I’m sure other random stories will come to me here and there over the next few days… but that’s pretty much it in a nutshell.

Oh, and Tink, I expect to see your ass in these pictures next year! Third Saturday in August. Book now. ;)

Words cannot describe…

2008-08-23T00:05:00.001-04:00

…how tired I am right now. This pig roast preparation kicks our ass every year. And I swear, every year, I wonder WHY the hell we do it. But soooo many people tell us they look forward to it, that we keep doing it. We get help here and there from the same people every year, but for the most part, it’s all me and Steve. And we’re exhausted.

And come 3:00 (or so) tomorrow, 150+ people will mill into our backyard and have fun. They don’t realize how much work was put into them having “fun”. And we still have soooo much to do tomorrow before 3:00 that my mind is spinning just thinking about it. So I think I need to go to bed now. Because if I don’t, I’ll be asleep before anyone even shows up tomorrow. Sigh.

Photos and a post at some point after the pig roast…

Crap.

2008-08-21T00:55:00.001-04:00

I came home from work today to find several new voice mail and email messages…

Steve’s Cousin, Trish: “Hey guys! It’s Trish! We’re so excited about the pig roast on Saturday! I just wanted to let you guys know that there will be six of us definitely coming, but possibly 8 or 10 of us! See you then!” (We encourage people to bring friends BTW….)

My friend, Danette (whom we didn’t invite until this year): “Hey Allison! Carlin and I will be coming, but it probably won’t be until around 7:00!”

Joy and Tom: “Hey guys! We’ll be there! Call and let us know if you need anything!” <—This woman used to work with my mom at the daycare, was at one point, both of my girls’ teacher, and can drink like a champ. Her and her husband are my mom’s age, are always one of the last to leave every year, and she loves Jello shots and we had her doing beer bongs one year. I ADORE this woman. LOL!

Jason (the guy we hired to sing that we’ve become friends with): “Hey, I’m bringing the guy I’m sort of dating and I also invited 3 or 4 other friends. We’re excited! See you Saturday!”

Even our gay hair dresser and his boyfriend are coming. Seriously. This thing has spiraled out of control this year. This is both good and bad. Good, because just based on RSVP’s and new people this year, we’re probably looking at close to 150-200 people in our backyard that day. Bad because the pressure is now on to make it that much better.

Shit. Shit. Shit. I think I need to call the beer distributor in the morning and add another few kegs onto our order. [shaking head] What the hell is happening? LOL! All in all, I’m excited. I think it’s going to be SO much fun!

We’ve heard through the grapevine that our hairdresser has questioned what one wears to a pig roast. Steve & I both have haircut appointments on Friday morning. We’ve decided we’ll tell him that all guests show up in pig costumes. ROFLMAO! Seriously…. how fucking funny would that be? LOL!

Tink, if you’re serious about coming up for this thing next year, then you may have planned it perfectly. Because we’ve got a good 60 new comers this year, and if THEY all bring other people next year, etc. you could be looking at one hell of a good time. I’m bummed you’re not here this year, mind you, but hopefully, enough people will have fun this year that they all come back again. (And you & Hoop WILL stay with us here at the house if you come up. OMG! We’ll have so much freakin’ fun! LOL!)

OK. I need to get to bed. I HAVE to make an effort to actually work tomorrow, since Friday will be shot to hell with the pig roast preparation. Tomorrow I’ll give my predictions on what I think my sister-in-law will wear that day. Later guys…

PS: I discovered tonight how stupid I really am, but I’ll get into that during tomorrow’s post. Right now, my pillow is begging for my head to hit it.

Things change…

2008-08-19T23:10:00.001-04:00

So I had planned on coming here and copy/pasting a long ass email that I sent to my friends earlier today. It outlined the mini panic attacks I’m having today because of the HUGE list of things we need to do/clean/buy in the next 3 days before the pig roast. It ain’t pretty people. It really isn’t. Sigh.

But instead, we’re going to talk about something fun because ~~y’all don’t give a shit about my pig roast stress~~ I’m a fun kind of person. I asked for some song suggestions on one of my daily message boards to make mix CDs for the pig roast. We hired a guy to sing (that we’ve become really good friends with), but he’s only singing for 3 hours or so and the pig roast is WAY longer than that. So I wanted to make some mixes with all sorts of music on them. Well, the suggestions started pouring in. And those suggestions made me think of other songs/artists. Oh my. I’m taking a HUGE trip down Memory Lane tonight.

Some of the songs I downloaded are downright ridiculous, some are cool, some are just plain fun, and some are hilarious. Tonight, I’m listening to them while I burn the CDs. I’ve got everything from:

Skid Row (“18 and Life” and "I Remember You" bay-beeee!)
My Humps by Black Eyed Peas (Because you can’t hear that song and NOT shake your ass obnoxiously)
“Bye Bye Bye” by N’Sync (Because if I get Steve drunk enough, he might do the dance for us all.)
Some Blues Traveler (Because they just kick serious ass.)
“Oh Mickey” (Because I hate cheerleaders and that video always made me cringe, and I'm all about self-punishment.)
“The Day the Music Died” (I’m imagining a big sing-along when that one plays.)
“Little Red Corvette” (Because it’s the best Prince song ever recorded.)
“Footloose” (Wouldn’t it be cool if the whole pig roast broke into a choreographed dance?)
“Thank God I’m a Country Boy” (fitting for most of the guests)
“Back in Black” by AC/DC and “Cum on Feel the Noise” by Quiet Riot (Oh, how I miss the mullets.)
“Time Warp” from the Rocky Horror Picture Show
A bunch by Lynard Skynard songs (Who the hell spelled their name anyway? It’s ridiculous.)
Whitesnake (I’m totally going to throw myself on the hood of a car when that one plays and grind around like a whore.)
“Right Now” by Van Halen (Because Sammy Hagar was WAY cooler than that first dude.)
A few by Firehouse (Because I want everyone to just randomly start making out.)
“Ice Ice Baby” by Vanilla Ice and “U Can’t Touch This” by MC Hammer (because I still remember EVERY step of the dances we made up for my senior year talent show, it’s how I got my nickname “Alli-Ho” at the time. And because, frankly, I’m 2 Legit 2 Quit)
Counting Crows (Because the lead singer was/is HOT.)
“Baby Got Back (I Like Big Butts)” by Sir Mix Alot (No explanation needed. And because I plan to play it over and over again until my kids learn every word. Because that would just be funny.)

And then a ton of um, “cooler” and more current ones… Green Day, Kid Rock, Taylor Swift, Sara Barellis (I can never spell her last name, so that’s probably wrong), Smash Mouth, Guns N Roses, Tom Petty, Bowling for Soup, The Black Crowes, Rob Thomas, Rage Against the Machine, Van Morrison, The Steve Miller Band, etc.

And I know half of you who haven’t thought of some of these songs in ~~decades~~ years are clicking over right now to go download them. (Well, except maybe for Tink, because she’s too young to remember half of them… LOL!)

But PLEASE feel free to comment here and throw out your suggestions. I’ll take them all... 70’s, 80’s, 90’s, now, Motown, pop, rock, rap, dance, country, alternative, funny, cool, dorky, etc. I need more songs, people!! MORE!!! So help me out, OK?

And with that, I’m off to bed with a book and my newly loaded MP3 player. Later guys…

(PS: Thank you to the 70% of you that think I should have/can handle another kid. -- To the 7% of you that voted for a puppy… you obviously don’t know me well. I ~~greatly dislike~~ don’t like dogs much. However, I don’t want to deprive my kids of a puppy at some point of their childhood, so I imagine that at some point it’ll happen. – To the 22% of you that think I shouldn’t do either for whatever reason… um, fuck you? Thank you? Hmmmm….)

Weekend (and Monday) Recap

2008-08-18T23:34:00.001-04:00

I’m all about bulleted lists. It’s the tech writer in me. It makes things easier to read… keeps readers more interested… Etc. So we’re going to do it all again folks. Sit back, grab a drink, and enjoy the ride…

* Got a ton of stuff done on Saturday. Some inside the house… Some outside for the pig roast this weekend. It’s really happening, my friends. (I HATE the week leading up to it. There’s WAY too much to do!)

* Ordered the port-a-potty for the event. Because there’s no way in hell I’m letting 100+ people (most of them trashed off their asses) traipse in and out of my home to use our toilet. Nuh uh.

* Am a little bummed that none of my Internet friends are flying in for the roast this year, because that’s always fun. But also a little bit excited that I can just get drunk and act like a total ass with my real-life friends and Steve’s family, who seriously are the best damn people in the world.

* Not that I can’t act like an ass in front of my Internet friends, mind you. But they can all go home and post on message boards and blogs what an ass I really was. No one in my town is smart enough to have figured out the Internet yet (except me), so I think I’m safe.

* I’m SHOCKED at how many new-comers we have coming this year. Some we hadn’t invited before so it’s there first time because it’s their first opportunity. Some just couldn’t make it the other 4 years and finally can. But seriously, over 40 of the guests that RSVP’ed (and I’m sure a bunch that didn’t) are pig roast virgins. Although I think that’s cool, it also adds a bit of pressure to make it “that much better” this year. Dammit.

* We’re pretty sure this is going to be our biggest turnout yet. This is both cool and stressful in many, many ways. I seriously wish I could clone myself (twice… maybe thrice) to help me get done what needs to get done in the next 4 days. ACK! People have NO clue how much preparation goes into this thing. And for the most part, it’s just Steve and I doing it, with a few friends thrown in here and there occasionally helping, and in addition to our jobs, the kids, events, life, etc. WHY do we do this again? Someone remind me…

* “Thrice” is SUCH a dumb, stupid, made up sounding word.

* Hannah had kindergarten orientation tonight and she is SO excited to start kindergarten on Monday! Her teacher seems awesome and I know some of the parents of the kids in her class, so it should be a good year.

* Laughed my ASS off (actually, that would probably be a good thing. It’s a damn shame we can’t really do that, huh?) when Steve’s aunt called me out of the blue today, asking if “I heard their big news!” She sounded so excited that I assumed her daughter (Steve’s cousin) got engaged or someone was pregnant or something. But nope. She was calling just to tell me that her son and his totally psychotic wife are getting a divorce after less than a year. This is a GOOD thing. But the woman has never called me a day in her life. And then she called to tell me about her son’s divorce and I could just HEAR the woman smiling. LOL! Steve's family rules.

* We’re pretty sure Alien Baby #3 is going to occur. (Or at least be attempted.) What the FUCK is wrong with me? I must be seriously insane… Sigh.

OK. Off to do Internet searches on party canopies/tents. Because, you know, waiting until 4 days before the actual event is to take place is always the smart thing to do. (Goddammit, Steve!!! Grumble grumble.)

Total Drive-By

2008-08-14T23:56:00.002-04:00

The past few days have been nuts. Just busy. Pig roast stuff… work stuff… normal kid/family stuff… etc. So this is a quick post. Steve’s aunt and uncle from Florida (whom I adore), as well as their kids and Steve’s grandmother came up from Florida for the week. Tonight, we all met up at Steve’s dad’s house. In the span of just 4 hours I managed to:

* Find out my sister-in-law (yes, that one) has started drinking every night. (You GO girl! Maybe that’s why she’s been tolerable the last few times I’ve been around her. LOL!)

* Get my period suddenly, resulting in me having to “steal” a tampon from my FIL’s girlfriend’s daughter.

* Hear about a bunch of other people coming to the pig roast this year. (Cool!)

* Tell my father-in-law that Steve is his mini-me, which is both good and very bad in many, many ways (but which made my FIL happy, so I guess that part is good.)

* Show off my belly piercing to various family members, telling them all that the best way to overcome a mid-life crises is to get something pierced.

* Finally get my poor kids home and in bed by 11:00 tonight, which is way, WAY past their normal bedtime.

* Talk to my SIL (in a round-about way) about sex and how over half of our married friends complain about only getting it once a month. I’m sorry, but if you’re seriously only having sex 12 times a year, something’s wrong with the marriage. Period.

* In that same conversation, I noticed that both BIL and SIL didn’t seem to agree with me or indicate that they’re having it more often than that, so now I, of course, am convinced that their sex life sucks, which, for reasons that are beyond my ability to explain, has made me rather glib and gloaty. <--- Totally just made that word up.

* Have decided that a third Alien baby is just what this world needs. Don’t you think? Hannah and Grace could really use a younger brother or sister as far as I’m concerned. Either that or a puppy. Feel free to comment on which you think would benefit the world more. Puppies can be cute and all. But another child that could possibly support/care for us when we’re old and gray would certainly benefit us more. Thoughts? Vote in the poll over there in my sidebar. Seriously. I’m the type that would make a life-altering decision like that based on what random people on the internet thing. Go nuts.

(P.S. – If I plan it right, the third child would also be born in June (like the first two) and we could still have the pig roast next summer and I could still be the reining champion of beer pong. Tink SWEARS her and Hoop are coming up next year, so I can't be pregnant and not drinking should that happen. So it’s all good.) ;)

Not much time to blog…

2008-08-11T09:46:00.001-04:00

I’d like to, but unfortunately, my job, my messy house, stacks of laundry, and all sorts of other stuff are preventing me from doing that right now. Sigh.

But here’s a layout I whipped up last night. It’s Hannah in her ducky towel. I’ll be back later. :)

Credits: Background Paper & Frame: Emily Merritt… Orange & Yellow Papers: Bren Boone… Alpha: Jen Wilson… Tag: Misty Cato

Busy Day Ahead

2008-08-09T07:57:00.001-04:00

Well, it’s Saturday. Around here, that usually means a busy day for us. Sometimes, we just have lots of places to go. Others, we have no where to go, but then we’re home, which means cleaning, getting things done, etc.

Last Saturday, I busted some serious ass in our downstairs, going through all of the toys, steam cleaning the carpets, etc. This Saturday, I’m going to attempt to tackle the upstairs. This will be no easy task, which you would know if you could see the girls’ bedrooms. Just trust me. It won’t be fun. So after I post this, I’m heading up to put laundry away, pick things off the floor, go through old clothing, and finally, god willing, steam clean the carpets up there too. Should be fun. Not.

Anyway, I had a chance to work on some photos yesterday that I had taken over the past week. Um, enjoy? LOL!

This is Hannah in her ducky towel. Hannah doing this cracked Grace up for a good hour. LOL!

Grace, daydreaming about something…

The girls decided to get their umbrellas out to play in the sprinklers. Weird kids I have…

Steve, working on grinding the rust and old paint off of the old coal stoker we’ll be putting in our basement to replace the oil furnace we have. (He’s using paint thinner and other chemicals, which explains the gas mask. LOL!)

Hannah putting her rubber boots on to go play in our stream.

And finally, a shot of my girls’ boots. It makes me sad they won’t be able to fit in them much longer. They grow up so fast.

Enjoy your Saturday everyone! I’ll be back later! :)

An Odd Day

2008-08-07T23:25:00.001-04:00

My friend’s viewing was tonight. It was incredibly sad, and yet amazing at the same time. My parents, my sister, and I got there literally an hour and 15 minutes after the viewing had started and we still stood in line (in the pouring rain at times) for over an hour just to get into the funeral home. And when we did finally get in, there was still a line behind us with the back of it being where we had been when we first got there. EVERYONE loved this girl. And I mean everyone.

They had pictures of her everywhere you turned inside the funeral home. They had one album filled with pictures of her in high school and I was in quite a few of them. Although I was honored to have been a part of her life at one point, it also made me sad that I didn't keep in touch with her after that. But I know it happens, so what can you do? I could beat myself up over it, but at this point, what good would that do?

Her mom didn't recognize me at first (I really do look completely different from high school) and after I hugged her, she said, "Oh, did you work with her?" I laughed and said, "It's Allison L-------- (maiden name)!" She started laughing, yelled, "Oh for Cripes' sake! Come here! Did you see your pictures out there?" and gave me a huge hug. It was so sweet, and actually kind of funny. I saw almost everyone I knew from high school. And I mean everyone. From every class year before and after us, and from every social group. It was nice seeing some of them, since I haven't seen them since 1991 or so, but also kind of weird. Most of them don't look any different. And I mean AT ALL. Even my sister said after we left that I was the only one that looked even remotely different (not in a bad or good way... just different).

I saw some of our old gang (that used to hang out with Missy), so that was nice. It was just... weird. Really, really weird. It was awesome to see that so many people loved Missy so much. But at the same time, so sad that someone who was SO loved had to die.

It turns out that the autopsy revealed that she had almost complete blockages of her heart... 80%, 80%, and 90%. Just last month she hiked 10 miles in the Grand Canyon with no problems, and her and her boyfriend just built a house together. She woke up the other morning and didn't feel right. She told her boyfriend she had really bad indigestion and was going to lie down a for a bit before work. He got in the shower and when he got out, he thought she was sleeping. When he went to kiss her goodbye, he realized she wasn't breathing. Can you even imagine? And the fact that she had no symptoms up until then just boggles my mind and, frankly, scares the living shit out of me, if you want me to be honest.

Anyway, I'm glad it's over. The bottom line is that it sucked, but at the same time, made me feel glad to have had her in my life, even if just for a few years, ya know? And it reminded me (once again) to cherish every day you’re given and don’t take them for granted. You have no clue when your life is going to end, so spending it being angry, or bitter, or miserable, or unhappy just isn’t worth it. Appreciate your friends… appreciate your family… and appreciate that you still get to wake up every morning. Because that could all change tomorrow.

(And on that note, I promise that there will be no depressing post tomorrow. In fact, I think I’m going to dig out some old high school photos and post them here. Trust me people. You’ll laugh. You’ll laugh really, really hard.)

I’m Getting There…

2008-08-07T00:52:00.002-04:00

OK. I promise this post won’t be all sad and stuff. My friend’s death just really put me in a weird place yesterday. I’m still in that place, but I’m OK with being in that place for now. My parents and I are going to her viewing tomorrow night, and I know it’s going to be insanely sad and difficult and depressing and life-altering. But, at the very least, it will help me realize (yet again) that life is short and I should do what I can with it while I still have it. So, I’ll move on…

The first round of pig roast invitations went out today. The second round will go out tomorrow after I look up about 8 billion more addresses. And I have a good 60 or 70 to send out via email (which is WAY easier than this snail mail shit). I can’t believe it’s in only a few weeks. We’re so screwed. We always have soooo much to do to prepare for it, and once you throw in my deadlines at work and the fact that I need to start getting the girls geared up for school (starting 2 days after the pig roast), and I’m up a shit crick (<—this is where Tracey laughs because NO ONE around here says “creek.” It’s “crick.” And this amuses her in ways I didn’t think were possible). But somehow, we’ll pull it out of our asses and do what we have to do to get everything ready.

I’m pretty pumped about it this year. We’ve got a lot of new-comers coming this year. People that were never here before that I hope will have fun. And between the guy we hired to sing, my hairdresser and his boyfriend, and the guy I work with and his boyfriend, it could turn into a Gay Pride festival. But it’s all good. We own lots of guns, so if any of the local rednecks give them trouble, we’ll just dig into our stash and start blasting buckshot into their asses, while the rest of us do shots and wave our rainbow flags. As long as everyone’s drunk, it’s a good night, right?

I hooked up with a bunch of old college friends on Facebook today. That was cool. I haven’t talked to most (any?) of them since graduation, and judging by their photos and the messages they've written on my Wall, they really haven’t changed much at all, which is cool. It’s funny, because whenever I get an “invitation” from one of those sites (Facebook, LinkedIn, etc.), my mind immediately flashes to a funny incident I had with that person… Like the HUGE argument I got into with Bob, the real-life incarnation of Alex P. Keaton from Family Ties. We were seriously ready to swing at each other, but for the life of me, I can’t remember what the hell we were pissed about. LOL!… And Lee, who I went home to Connecticut with during one college break and met her hilarious friend. We went bowling, and her friend typed “Asswipe” in as her name. When questioned, she said it was pronounced “Ass-WE-pay”, with a French accent. I almost pissed myself laughing… And how Gary absolutely ADORED Madonna and did the best impersonation of her from that video where she wore the big cone boob thing. Ahhh… the good ol’ days. I’d love if I could get the whole gang of us (and there were a lot of us) back together again and just shoot the shit. It would be awesome.

But let’s not dwell on the past. Let’s look ahead to the future. For example, let’s take a look at a rather small portion of my To Do list for tomorrow:

* Email Cay and make up an excuse for why we can’t come visit her (90 miles away) on Sunday.

* Finish the online help system for work.

* Call Steve’s insurance company and have them fax Steve’s business Proof of Insurance to various contractors.

* Find some new songs to download. I’m sick of the ones I have. <— (This one is time-permitting.)

* Run to WalMart and print out another 50 pig roast invitations.

* Look up a shitload of address so I can mail the aforementioned invitations.

* Affix address labels to the shitload of invitations.

* Run to the post office to grab another 60 postcard stamps to put on the shitload of invitations.

* Compose and send an email (with the pig roast invitation attached) to anyone with addresses in my Gmail Contacts folder.

* Laundry. Dear god, the laundry… [shaking head]

* Clean the entire upstairs so I can steam clean the carpets up there before my sister ~~asks for~~ demands her steam cleaner back.

* Drive the 15 miles to Hannah’s doctor so I can have them fill out the physical form she’s required to have to start kindergarten, and of which I knew nothing about.

* Drop off pig roast invitations at the hair salon for my hair dresser and two women that work there.

* Attend a viewing for a girl who was WAY too young to die. :(

And on that note, I’m outta here.Sigh. I think I should go to bed. Later gang.

Make it stop. Please?

2008-08-06T01:23:00.002-04:00

The past few days have truly sucked. They weren’t complete suckage of course because there are always those moments every day that bring you some joy and make you smile. But seriously, what the hell is going on?

I found out today that one of my good (at the time) high school friends died two nights ago. In high school, we were pretty close, but we grew apart after graduation and I honestly haven’t seen or spoken to her since our 10-year class reunion in 2001. But she was awesome. And two nights ago, she went to bed with some mild chest pains and never woke up. She was born literally 5 days before I was, and frankly, her death is freaking me out. I’ve had friends die before, but that was back in high school and they were all people that chose to take their own lives. This is the first person I know that's my age that died because of some freakish medical issue that, from what I've gathered, she probably didn't even know about.

It's made me think about a lot of things today. I've had a flood of emails, phone calls, and MySpace messages from other high school friends asking if I had heard the news. Some of these people I literally haven't talked to since high school. And although it's a horrible situation that spawned it, I couldn't help but feel a deep sense of peace that those of us that went to school together still feel comfortable enough to talk to each other 17 years after we were all friends. (Small towns really do rule.)

And it made me look at my kids differently tonight, making me wonder what night in the future I'll go to bed and not wake up.

And it made me re-evaluate my own habits. And although I know (and have known) that I NEED to change a lot of my daily life, I don't know if I have the drive and will-power to do it.

And I questioned why it always seems to be "the good people" that lose their lives. My friend was a total class clown, loved everyone, was friends with everyone, was always smiling and laughing, had the best laugh I've ever heard, and there were probably very few people on this earth that had a problem with her. And now she's gone. And I'm having a rough time dealing with that.

And it made me think back to high school when I had no real responsibilities and everything was grand and we had no clue what life really was. I laughed my ass off on a daily basis, and truly enjoyed life. I still enjoy every day of my life now, but it was just a "different" kind of joy, ya know? That ignorant joy that we, as adults, often long for.

I probably wouldn't have been quite this affected by her death if other stuff wasn't going on right now.

Tommie (my nephew) has another severe infection in his colon. They're doing some crazy, strong treatments on him right now, but if that doesn't work, he may lose his entire colon and have a colostomy bag for the rest of his life. The bag he has now was supposed to be temporary, so I know he's pretty sad and scared right now. The doctors have no clue why he keeps getting these infections and if they can't stop it, I can't even say what could happen to him, and the doctor hinted, but I can't even bring myself to think about that. No 17-year-old kid deserves that, ya know?

Other than that, it's just a lot of life's little bullshit stuff... crazy deadlines at work... Steve not having any more worked lined up after next week and possibly needing to find a temporary job this winter, the girls starting school in a few weeks and me not having them even remotely prepared in terms of clothing, supplies, etc... my FIL's girlfriend needing chemo treatments again after beating ovarian cancer 2 years ago... and all that other life shit that all seems to dump on you at once. Life just really isn't fair sometimes, ya know?

So sorry to anyone who came here tonight, hoping for a funny anecdote about Hannah and her amazing talent of

(LOL! Dudes, I just read this today and realized that I fell asleep at my computer last night, and apparently hit Post while halfway through a sentence. Ah well... I was almost done anyway. LOL!)

My Little, um... Model?

2008-08-04T09:20:00.001-04:00

So yesterday, I was cleaning the house like it’s never been cleaned before. Steve spent the entire day down in the garage, grinding the rust off of a coal stoker we’re going to install before the winter (oil is too expensive anymore).

So at one point, the girls decided they wanted to go hang out "down back" with Daddy. Awesome. We told them that if they had any plans to go into the stream, that they needed to wear their fishing boots. I also told Hannah she had to change her clothing, since she was wearing good stuff.

So off she goes upstairs and came down about 15 minutes later (clothing decisions are always hard for her... LOL!). She looked, um, interesting? {shaking head} The kid kills me. Here's her attire for a day in the yard...

After I took this first photo, she told me she wanted to "pose." No shock there. The kid LOVES the camera and works it like it's her job.

Um, I need to work with her on what constitutes a "cool" pose I think, no? LOL!

And the Mother of the Year Award goes to...

2008-08-02T17:56:00.002-04:00

... um, someone other than me? LOL! Now granted, this isn't really my fault. And I didn't really do anything wrong. But Hannah's new favorite song is "Fat Bottomed Girls." The Kid Rock version. I didn't think anything of it at first, except she seems to be stuck on one line. The one that goes, "She was such a naughty nanny." She sings it over... and over... and over... and over...

What makes it really funny is that she sings it like she's some sort of middle-aged, slimy pimp or something. She gets a coy look on her face, kind of looks at you out of the corner of her eyes and sings it in a gravely voice... "She was such a naughty nanny..."

Great. Hey, at least she's listening to cool music, right? Sigh.

Is it wrong for a grown woman to cry?

2008-08-02T14:05:00.003-04:00

Because I would like to right now. I woke up this morning, looked around my house, and decided I either had to do something about its condition or burn it to the ground while laughing maniacally. I opted for the former choice and so began my day of hell, of which I'm in the midst of right now.

You see, I haven't thrown away a single toy since Grace was born 7 years ago. Not one, unless it was broken or damaged or something. I've got exersaucers, rattles, pull toys, walking toys, every stupid piece of plastic crap they got at fast food restaurants or in birthday party goody bags. Every last effing one of 'em.

Well, since I started this morning, I've filled two entire garbage bags with the crap mentioned above. And I'm not even half done yet. And now, my entire downstairs AND the playroom in the basement are totally trashed, so I couldn't stop now even if I wanted to. I'm screwed.

It DOES feel good to start seeing some floor space. And it's my own fault for letting it get to this point. But that doesn't make it any more fun. I'm sweating, I'm hungry, I'm tired, and I'm in a bad mood. LOL!

I finally (now) had to sit down to take a break. I cracked a beer and decided to catch up on some blogs. Don't worry, I won't have another beer until later tonight. But I kind of needed it right now as that last little boost of fuel to help me finish before my kids are graduating from high school. I really only have one more big pile in a corner of the downstairs playroom to do... And go through all Hannah's dolls clothing that's currently in about 8 different over-stuffed bags and baskets... And go through the 8 million crayons, pencils and notebooks the girls have... And dig through the two thousand purses the girls have, filled to the top with little crap and play makeup... And mop the floors I haven't seen for years... And vacuum the rugs... And...

Crap. Maybe I will have that second beer. LOL! If you don't hear from me tonight, it's because I got to the point where I decided my earlier idea of burning down the house was easier. If that's the case, I'll make sure to remove my computer before setting the blaze, so I can check in here and there from the Red Cross shelter...

Got my free ArtsCow photo book today…

2008-08-02T01:17:00.001-04:00

And I couldn't be happier. They are literally identical to Shutterfly's photo books, except ArtsCow's standard is 30 pages (which is more than Shutterfly's) and they're cheaper.

Shutterfly's books are normally $29.99 for the first 20 pages and $1.00 for each additional page. ArtsCow's are normally $15.99 for 30 pages. Shipping at ArtsCow is a bit more ($11.99) because they come from Japan, but that's still less total than Shutterfly. They do take a little longer to receive (2 weeks from the day I ordered until the day it arrived), but as long as you plan ahead and aren't in a hurry, it's well worth it in my opinion.

If you register at ArtsCow, you get a free photo book (you pay the $11.99 shipping) plus a TON of other free credits. Here are some photos. Any discoloration you see is completely because my white balance was off in my camera and I didn't take the time to edit these photos ~~much~~ at all.

And I was just about to post photos of the outside cover, but I realized that our last name is on it and I’m too lazy to go blur it out right now (it’s 1:15 AM), so I’ll post those tomorrow.

If anyone signed up the first time I mentioned it and your free 8x8” photo book credit expired, I have 10 codes here to get another free one. Well, technically, they say it’s $11.99 and the shipping’s free. But shipping is normally $11.99, so it’s easier to say that the photo book is free. :D

(And the codes came with my photo book, so no, I am not affiliated in any way with ArtsCow. ;)

Anyway, if anyone wants a code, post a comment here and I’ll hook you up with one. :)

Also, if you process your photos in Photoshop or Elements, etc. or if you're ordering a photo book of your layouts, MAKE SURE to turn off image enhancements. Click on the Print Options link in the main menu on the left-hand side and deselect the Image Enhancement box. That's also where you select matte or glossy as your default for prints.

Attention Blog Owners!!!!

2008-08-02T00:26:00.004-04:00

After an hour my poor friend spent trying to help me fix my IE issue, I just found this post online:

http://volokh.com/posts/1217644268.shtml

It's been happening to EVERYONE today and it's happening on blogs that have a Site Meter installed on their blog. That link up there will explain it all. There IS a work around apparently:

"To fix IE7: Click on the menu Tools -> Internet Options. Click on the tab Security. Click on the icon Restricted Sites. Click on the button Sites. Type the text '*.sitemeter.com' (without quotes). Click the Add button. That will fix the problem."

But may I personally suggest that you get the hell out of Internet Explorer as fast as you can!!! I switched to Firefox awhile ago and won't ever look back. Ever. Firefox RULES!

Anyway, so if anyone else out there has a Site Meter running on their blog, you may want to disable it for now. Or lots of people may not be able to read your blog.

Favor Please!

2008-08-01T23:00:00.001-04:00

If ANYONE out there is reading this in Internet Explorer with no problems, can you PLEASE comment and let me know you can read this? Because if you can, then my friend Carrie and I have other issues to deal with. LOL! Thanks!

Crap.

2008-08-01T22:36:00.003-04:00

Apparently people in IE can't see my blog anymore. I have to try to fix it. So if my template starts changing randomly in the next few hours, don't be alarmed. You're not drunk or tripping on acid. (Well, maybe you are, but that has nothing to do with me.) Hopefully, I'll have it fixed in a bit.

Beer Pong and a Homeless Dude

2008-07-31T23:27:00.002-04:00

I’m back again! I can tell you’re all excited. Yup. The love is just pouring through my cable connection and blasting me in the face.

Sooo… my friend, September (yes, that’s her real name, and no, her birthday isn’t in September) sent me a link to this article.

Now this upsets (and amuses) me for many reasons. First of all, although apparently parents around the world had a shit fit when Wii decided to release a beer pong video game (HELLO!?!? I’m going to go get in line for a Wii like NOW), I, on the other hand, was all sorts of giddy. I mean, I’m the reigning champion at our pig roasts, but imagine what I could do if I could play on a daily basis! Sweet Jesus, I just may make it to the Nationals! LOL!

But what really made me laugh was this paragraph….

“Still, there's no guarantee that simply taking the beer out of beer pong will have the sobering effect that college deans intend. Last year, Dartmouth College banned water pong, the real-world version of Pong Toss, because of the risk of water intoxication — it's no joke, as an H2O overdose can be fatal. "I know that [water pong] seems like a good balance between the Dartmouth drinking culture and just trying to have fun," Kristin Deal, a Dartmouth community director, wrote in an e-mail to students announcing the prohibition. "However, it can be just as dangerous, if not more so."”

Dudes. Do you realize what this means?! It means that every time, for the rest of my life, that some holier-than-thou person makes some crack about me drinking beer, or not drinking water, or not being healthy, etc., I can point them in the direction of this article, thumb my nose at them, tell them to fuck off, and inform them that I will, indeed, live longer than they will. Who the hell knew that water could be so damn dangerous? They should seriously ban that crap. Down with water, people! DOWN WITH WATER!!! I’m totally going to forbid water in this house and make the kids drink beer instead. Hell, it’s safer! ;)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

But enough about that. Let’s talk about the street dude at the zoo two weeks ago.

When we were leaving the zoo, and walking to our cars in the parking lot a few blocks over, we had to pass this guy…

He was playing his bongo drum and having a high ol’ time. I vaguely remember Steve handing Grace a dollar bill and telling her to go put it in whatever container he had sitting at his feet. Well, apparently, when you do this, it opens up the door for this guy to explode. All of a sudden, we were his best friends on the planet and we were sent to him to be his buddy for a few minutes. Following, are some conversations that took place.

Bongo Dude: Hey Mama! Come here and play the drum!

Me (pointing at myself): Who? Me?

Bongo Dude: No! What the hell? Her! (pointing at Grace)

Bongo dude proceeded to half drag Grace over to his bongo, sit her down, and force her to play. Not that she minded. (See post below this one for documented proof.)

Next up was Hannah. He did the same thing with her. And when she wasn’t smiling for the camera, he physically grabbed her cheeks and forced her sweet little mouth into a grin as all of the adults laughed. (Because apparently, we find it amusing that a strange man is accosting our children.)

After Hannah it was time for my nephew, Garrett (son to my camo-clad, visor-wearing sister-in-law), to take his turn. He played the drum and laughed the whole time.

Then the guy gave me a hug. Dear god, I seriously think I got drunk just from his breath. Not that I’m knocking him for that. Drink up, dude. But if I ever reek that strongly of alcohol, dear god, someone needs to put me out of my misery.

Last, but not least, was my other nephew, Gunnar (AKA: Devil's Spawn). Bongo Dude was particularly funny with him.

Bongo Dude: Son of a bitch, he’s insane! Look at him go! Damn! You’re fucked with this one (looking at SIL).

Now keep in mind he’s saying all of this LOUDLY, in front of the kids. I couldn’t stop laughing and snapping pictures long enough to be offended.

Finally, we say our goodbyes and get ready to continue our walk to the car. I notice that about 10 feet past the guy is a large graffiti mural of a hippo in amazing colors. Perfect spot for a photo op with the kids since they’ve just had the amazing experience of feeding the hippos at the zoo we’re leaving.

Well, Bongo Dude decided he wasn’t done with us yet, so he jumped into the picture. That wasn’t nearly as funny as the actual conversation that followed. He jumps in the picture and I realize I can’t fit all of the kids in my frame, so I tell my nephew, Garrett, to move in closer.

Bongo Dude: He just doesn’t like black people. That’s cool, dude. I’m a fucking racist too.

(He’s saying all of this while laughing hysterically.)

Seriously, let’s look at the photo again and speculate on what each person was thinking…

Grace: Thank GOD this guy isn’t touching me! Can we leave now so I can get to the car and check out the new shit you just bought me in the souvenir shop?

Gunnar: I can’t even look at the camera right now. How did this guy know I’m a racist? Damn. He must be a psychic.

Bongo Dude: Look at me with all these kids! I fucking RULE!

Hannah: Perhaps, if I keep staring straight ahead at the camera, I can forget that this odd man is touching me and making me pass out with his bad breath that smells just like Mommy’s.

Garrett: Son of a bitch! Stop choking me, ASSHOLE!!!

Seriously guys, I was laughing so hard, I could barely take the picture. The guy was awesome. Happy as hell, I tell ya. Before we (finally) walked away, he walked up and gave Steve and my brother-in-law HUGE hugs. Not me and my sister-in-law, mind you. Just the guys. I developed a little bit of a complex right in that moment, but I’ve since decided it shouldn’t bother me. But it was friggin’ hilarious.

I love Bongo Dude. Everyone should have a Bongo Dude in their lives. [happy sigh]

So that’s your assignment for the week – go out and find a Bongo-like dude to take pictures of. Bongo Dudes RULE! :P

Just posting a few photos…

2008-07-31T18:59:00.001-04:00

While the kids are outside with Steve and his friend and the house is quiet. In a few minutes, everyone will come barreling in the house and the silence will be broken. Sigh. But anyway, I had the chance to post-process a few more photos from our zoo trip. The focus is a bit off in them (because the damn subjects kept moving (LOL!), but I still like ‘em. I’ll be back later with a “real” post.

Hannah messing around with her cousin, Garrett…

Grace taking a break…

Grace playing the street dude’s bongo. The story with this guy is HILARIOUS! I’ll post it tonight…

I almost forgot…

2008-07-31T09:50:00.001-04:00

In all the excitement of Em and Tracey being here over the weekend, I forgot to inform the world that Hannah lost her second tooth! It’s been loose for awhile now, and on Friday, she just reached into her mouth at daycare and pulled the sucker out! LOL!

And here’s another picture of her this morning. She was determined to match her cheetah. So they’re both wearing white shirts, jeans, and a sheer pink dance skirt over the top. (Yes, she’s wearing jeans too.) The kid went to daycare like that. She seriously kills me. {shaking head}

PS: I know this photo is a bad one. Focus is off, color casts, etc. But she was literally walking out the door for daycare and I pulled her back in so I could snap the picture.

Anyway, I need to shower now and get moving on some work I have to do. I’ll be back later. :)

Quote of the Day:
There should be no yelling in the home unless there is a fire.
--David Oman McKay

Short one tonight…

2008-07-31T00:06:00.001-04:00

Because I’m tired. And it’s late.

* I have a big zit right next to my nose. I can’t tell you the last time I had a zit. What the hell?

* I hate driving into the office. Hate it. And today I did it again. And I hated it.

* My To Do list is way too long. Waaaaayyyyy too long. (Personally AND at work. Sigh.)

* Only a few more weeks until the pig roast. Shit. I haven’t even made up the invitations yet. Sigh. Tomorrow. For real.

* The IRS can bite me.

* Tomorrow I’ll post how my darling daughter, Grace, apparently loves me more than Steve and how she tried to seek revenge for her father trying to kill her mother with a snakeskin. (Seriously. Paybacks are a bitch.)

* I’m falling asleep while sitting here, so this has to be it. Um, sorry I just wasted 30 seconds of your life.

Quote of the Day:
Wherever you are -- be there.
--Anonymous

Blog Awards!

2008-07-30T01:17:00.001-04:00

Mine. Not yours. Meaning they’ll be awards given to YOU, not me. I’m totally stealing this idea from Tink (whom, if you haven’t noticed, I’m a bit ~~obsessed with~~ in awe of). I’m a self-admitted blog whore actually. My problem is that I read SO many that I couldn’t possibly do it without a read feeder (with Feedly being my choice these days). Unfortunately, when you read blogs in a read feeder, it’s another few extra steps to actually comment on a blog.

So Mary, Geena, and lots and lots of my other readers, I DO read your blogs every time you post. I’m just too damn ~~lazy~~ busy to click over to your blog to comment. So we’ll handle that whole ignorance on my part with some awards. I’ll make one (or several?) up in Photoshop in the next few days, and then we’ll see where it goes from there. Because life is too short not to have an award displayed on your blog. :)

When all else fails…

2008-07-29T22:58:00.001-04:00

Steal an idea from someone else’s blog. I stole this from Kim, who stole it from Mary. Go on… be a thief too! It’s fun!

(Please keep in mind that I was an English major in college. I can assure you that if I hadn’t been, I wouldn’t have read half of these books that I did.)

The Big Read estimates that the average person has only read 6 of the 100 greatest books ever printed.

Copy and paste to your blog and play along! Bold books you've read, and italics books you love.

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4 The Harry Potter Series - JK Rowling (Tried once. HATED it.)
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6 The Bible A lot of it. Does that count?
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials – Phillip Pullman
10 Great Expectations – Charles Dickens
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller.
14 The Complete works of Shakespeare Most of ‘em.
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit – J.R.R. Tolkien (Again. I tried. Hated this too.)
17 Birdsong – Sebastian Faulks
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger (Best book EVER written!!!!)
19 The Time Traveler's Wife
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26 Brideshead Revisited – Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck (Amazingly brilliant.)
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield – Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34 Emma - Jane Austen
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies – William Golding
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52 Dune- Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck (Again, amazing.)
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick – Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 notes from a small island
75 Ulysses - James Joyce
76 The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77 Swallows and Amazons
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession - AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte’s Web - EB White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven – Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection – Enid Blyton didn't read it can't remove it
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince – Antoine de St. Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory – Iain Banks
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces – John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town like Alice- Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98 Hamlet- William Shakespeare
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables – Victor Hugo read the abridged version

Alrighty. Let’s talk about the E.T. visit.

2008-07-29T00:10:00.001-04:00

E.T. as in Emily and Tracey. Get it? ET… Extra Terrestrial… Planet Alien… (Ah, never mind. I don’t think it’s that funny either.)

Anyway, I apologize up front for not having any photos. As per usual, when an event or something important takes place, I seem to discard all thoughts of taking photos and I have none. Tracey did the same thing. So other than the ones I already posted in my last post, and one or two others that will NEVER be posted online (because of my gut), we didn’t take any. I lie. There are one or two of random signs and streets, but none even worth really taking the time to play with and post. So you’ll just have to use your imaginations and picture the photos based on my uncanny ability to describe things in words for others to see in their heads. (In other words, you’re screwed. LOL!)

So that being said, we had a blast! They got here Thursday afternoon and we just hung out, ate, drank a bit, and laughed.

On Friday, the two of them, me, and my friend, Rachelle, went to Jim Thorpe to browse, eat, and just chill. We went into the COOLEST consignment shop where Tracey bought earrings, Emily bought jewelry for her daughters, and I bought a cool Asian style purse for $5.00 (photos tomorrow).

Then we ate lunch where Emily tried pierogies for the first time. Dear god, does that woman not know what she’s been missing her entire life? [shaking head] After lunch, we walked around some more, and then we hit the tattoo parlor where I got my belly button pierced.

That night, Rachelle and her boyfriend came over to our house and so did our friend, Joe, and all hung out, drank too much, ate too much, and laughed our asses off.

On Saturday, Emily, Tracey, me, and my two girls headed to the site of the World’s Largest General Store. Since burning down 2 summers ago (or last summer?), it’s just not the same, and frankly, is rather depressing. Tracey bought a cool metal sign from The Holy Grail that says something about farting. I hate that movie [ducking and running], I couldn’t tell you the exact quote on it.

Then we headed to an indoor flea market and antique store (2 separate businesses) down the street from my house. I’d never been to either and now, I expect, I’ll be back at both quite a bit. At the flea market, I bought some stuff for the girls, a bracelet for myself, and random odds and ends.

Then we came back to the house where we pretty much crashed. Tracey and I almost dozed off once, but we managed to fight it and stay awake. It wasn’t too long after that that I drove the kids to my parents’ house for the night so the adults could head out to mine and Steve’s usual weekly bar.

Words cannot describe how much fun I had there that night. Emily was keeping up with me beer for beer (YAY Emily!), and was feeling it (as was I). Throw in a few shots of Red-Headed Slut, a Car Bomb (bought for us by the bar owner and I promise you, will be the last one I ever drink… Ew!), and a Buttery Nipple or two, and we were hammered. I introduced them to my favorite regular, Skip (who is probably in his 50's)… we were all flabbergasted when Tracey said she’d never tried a cheese steak in her life… and made fun of Rachelle’s boyfriend, Dan.

A couple I’ve seen several times was there, and I had watched them buy person after person drinks. I told my girls I was going to work it and score a free drink from them. So I walked over, introduced myself, and talked to them for about 15 minutes. They left right after that, but not before buying Steve and I our next round. WOOHOO! Mission accomplished. Score 1 for Allison! I friggin’ rule! LOL!

At one point, an entire wedding reception crowd wandered in and things got nuts. I found the cutest guy in the world amongst them, but had no single girlfriends around to hook him up with, so I was pissed. LOL!

Also in the crowd was the creepiest dude I’ve ever met in my life. A middle-aged Indian dude who had a staring problem. He was only one barstool over, and every time we looked at him, he was staring RIGHT at us. Not even the type of person that once you catch their eye, they quick turn away. Oh no. You’d look at him and he’d just KEEP staring at you. And he was only 3 feet away so it was really uncomfortable. [shudder] I KNOW I’m going to turn on “America’s Most Wanted” one day and see him on it. I just know it.

Conversation in Bar # 1

Other Girl in Bar: Well, I do everything else with my right hand, but I masturbate with my left.

Me: What?! That’s weird.

OGIB: I know. I just always have.

Me: So does that mean if I use both of my hands next time, I can say I had a menage a trois?

Tracey: Yeah. And then you can tell everyone how “that guy on the left” was obviously uncomfortable and didn't know what he was doing.

Me: Dude, what do you expect?! He’s a virgin!

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Conversation in Bar # 2

Me: Let’s order some Buttery Nipples.

(Pause as I look over at Skip, who is standing with us.)

Me: Poor Skip. He doesn’t know what we’re talking about. The next time he's with a chick, he'll think back to this and start rubbing butter on the poor girl's chest.

Skip (Laughing): I'll be all excited, yelling, "I can't believe it's not butter!"

Me: Just don't buy that shitty spray stuff. That stuff sucks.

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When we decided to call it a night, the best bartender in the world, Jen, handed us our check. She made some comment about nothing being added to our bill for over an hour and the whole tab was only around $60. I love her. So we paid the check and threw her a $20 tip. ;)

We left and came back home, where Tracey proceeded to have a minor nosebleed and shove a tampon up her nose to be funny (it worked), and Emily spent 20 minutes talking strictly with an Indian accent (and rather well I might add), but those are other stories for other times. LOL! Let's just say that I'm surprised I didn't piss myself from laughing so hard that night. I love my girls! :)

The next day (yesterday) they both left my house to head home, but both of them had um, "flight issues" and didn't get home until today. Sigh. See? That is why I don't set foot on an airplane. I told you so.

And with that, my visit from my friends seemed to end as soon as it started. Sigh. Anyone free next weekend? Wanna come visit? Because I could introduce you to the coolest Indian dude...

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PS: I'll be working on tweaking my blog layout and template for the next day or two. If anything is completely off, chances are I already realize it and will fix it ASAP, OK?

Quote of the Day:
Many people take no care of their money till they come nearly to the end of it, and others do just the same with their time.
--Goethe

I did it!

2008-07-28T13:20:00.001-04:00

OK. So Emily and Tracey flew in to visit me on Thursday, and just left yesterday. (Well, they left my house. Actually back to their own homes proved challenging for both of them, but that’s another story…)

Anyway, on Friday, the three of us and my friend, Rachelle, headed to Jim Thorpe to eat lunch, browse the old shops, and just get some good, quality friend time in.

Because I had mentioned it last week, they were determined to get my naval pierced. Well, we went past a tattoo shop that said “Piercings” on the front and there was no turning back. I don’t really think they would’ve given me a choice. LOL!

So in we went, I sucked it up (er, literally), and I got it pierced! The guy was pretty cool and I was probably the worst client ever. Not because I was scared, or freaking out, or anything like that. But because I wouldn’t shut up. And when you talk, your stomach moves. (Well, one my size does anyway.) And he had to keep shushing me while he tried to mark my stomach where the piercing should be, while he was trying to screw the little ball thing on, while he was trying to prep the area and then clean up afterwards. Oops. Sorry dude. He was funny about it though, so it’s all cool.

Anyway, I have a few photos. But Tracey (who took the pictures) couldn’t use a flash, so I had to do a little “doctoring” on these pictures. I actually have more photos than this, but I either look ridiculously large in them, or I’m making the dorkiest faces you’ve ever seen in your life. So this is it for now, my friends…

Here’s him trying to mark me. Please note my face. It’s painfully obvious I was talking during this one. He shushed me right after this was taken. LOL! (And Tracey, if you look at the original of this and start getting confused, the answer is yes… I absolutely, positively used the Liquify tool on this in Photoshop and pushed my lower stomach in a good 3 or 4 inches (at least). It was either that or not post the photo at all. LOL!)

And here I am AS he’s shoving the rod into my poor clamped stomach. YOW!

It actually didn’t hurt that badly. It didn’t tickle or anything. But it was a few seconds of a lot of pressure, some pinching, and then we were done.

I just took these a few minutes ago. I was a little bummed because I really wanted a nice, pretty sparkly one, but my only choices were swirly plastic balls. So I picked pink. I can wait three months and change it myself, or go back to him in a month and he’ll change it for me.

Oh, and no, I don’t normally stand like this. But I had to use the timer on my camera and stand where I thought the focal distance would fall. That ended up being kind of close to the camera, so I had to sort of do a straddle and push my hip out so my belly button would be in line with the camera. LOL! (And no, I did not Photoshop my stomach in these two shots. Let’s just say I look WAY better from the front than from the side. LOL!)

Anyway, I’ll blog later tonight with details of the girls’ visit! We had so much fun and I have lots of stories. But I REALLY need to go work and get some cleaning and laundry done. Later guys!

I Need Calgon.

2008-07-24T00:10:00.001-04:00

Wow. I’m glad today is (for the most part) over. Just a crazy day, spent mostly in my car.

This morning, I got to go to the Lilly Pulitzer warehouse to take some photos for a brochure I’m developing for my company (LP is one of our clients) and it was pretty cool. I got some good shots and it was neat seeing the warehouse. But holy CRAP! We were walking through the warehouse and I saw boxes and boxes of LP shoes. Dudes, I glanced, and for a pair of sandals (with barely any raw materials what-so-ever) was $198.00!!!! Two hundred FREAKING dollars for a pair of sandals?!?! What… the… hell? Please tell me I’m not the only person out there that thinks that’s just insane! My god… There is no sandal on earth worth that much in my opinion.

But I quickly forgot about that since the rest of the day was a blur of driving, dinner, daycare pickup, some work, and cleaning. Why the cleaning you ask?

BECAUSE MY GIRLS ARE COMING HERE TOMORROW!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!

God bless Tracey and Emily, because both of their flights leave at god awful times ~~tonight~~ tomorrow morning. Then they’ll fly into the Philly airport, meet up, pick up their rental car, and drive the 90 minutes to my house. Around 1:30 PM or so (estimated time), they’ll be pulling in my driveway, ready to start 4 days of drinking, eating, laughing, talking, bitching, moaning, sharing secrets, hanging with friends, taking pictures, and just being stupid. (We all do stupid rather well… LOL!) I am sooo excited! I so need this right now that it’s not even funny.

However, my day tomorrow leading up to the magic hour of 1:30 is going to be hell. Last minute cleaning and picking things up, cleaning the bathrooms, washing the sheets on any beds they’ll be sleeping in, picking up the cigarette butts littering the stones next to my back door (relax people… there are only a few there), doing a quick wet Swiffer of the downstairs, and a quick vacuuming of the upstairs. Throw in a very quick trip to the grocery store to pick up each girl’s favorite flavor of coffee creamer and some ~~crappy but oh-so-good~~ non-organic snacks and I’ll be golden. Oh, and work. I need to work at some point tomorrow too before they get here.

Shit. Now that I just read all of that, maybe I should just run to the grocery store and do some cleaning now before I go to bed. LOL! And I should probably be in bed, since I foresee us all being up until the wee hours of the night the next few days. And yet, here I sit… blogging, drinking a beer, and ~~freaking out~~ thinking about all of the things I need to do tomorrow morning. Son of a…

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Life in the Office

* Office Manager (Sandy) walks into my cubicle for something.

* She glances down at me, where I’m wearing a short, fitted skirt that falls to about mid-thigh when sitting down.

Sandy: Holy shit! You’re legs are beautiful!

Me (confused): Huh?

Sandy: Your legs. They’re gorgeous!

(This is where it’s painfully obvious that I don’t dress up much at the office. Ever.)

Me (slightly embarrassed): Shut up.

Sandy: No! For real! You have beautiful legs! (pause) Um, I’m not hitting on you.

Me: Shit.

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I just found a little bug floating in my beer. Nice. Real nice.

Anyway, I really should head to bed. I’ll try to pop in over the next few days to post a photo or two and blog about the awesome freakin’ time I’m having with the girls, but I’m making no promises. Because I always break my promises anyway, so it would be pointless. Later….

Only Two (and a Half) More Days…

2008-07-22T00:38:00.001-04:00

That’s all I need to get through. Two and a half short days. Life’s been nuts here lately. So much going on. Tons to do. Deadlines. An infestation (I’ll go into that some other time). A trashed house. And all sorts of other stuff.

But on Thursday, in the early afternoon, two of my best friends will be flying into Philadelphia and heading to my house for 4 fun-filled days of drinking, girl talk, shopping, eating, taking pictures, installing and teaching Photoshop, and laughing. I cannot wait! We’re going to have so much fun! I’ve rounded up some local friends to help with the ~~festivities~~ drinking, and we’re going to have a blast! Bars… beer… food… shopping… naval piercings (well, I’m hoping anyway)… and laughing until we pee ourselves.

However, before then, I have to write a 1000+ topic online help system, head to the Lilly Pulitzer warehouse to take pictures for the infamous brochure at work, create the brochure, do some Photoshop stuff for friends, clean my house (seriously… it’s BAD right now), rid the home of the aforementioned infestation (which is proving to be rather tedious), and lose 10 pounds (just kidding). But somehow, some way, I’ll get it done. And if I don’t? Who cares. Because I’ll be having too much fun to care.

Tink, you wanna come too? Because we’d love to have you and you could certainly use a vacation. :) OK. That’s kind of short notice I guess, but it would be cool. LOL!

And because I’m a total geek (as if there was any doubt), I’m mostly excited about the photo ops. I love me some good photography, and I’m going to follow my friends around like it’s my job, snapping photos like a total dork and then making them look all cool in Photoshop. (Tracey and Emily, you’ve been warned.)

However, that does mean I probably won’t be around much from Thursday through Sunday, which, I’m sure, has you all already yearning for me before I’m even gone. I don’t blame you. I’d yearn too. (<--- Sarcasm.) I’ll try to pop in here in the mornings before my lovely guests wake up, so I can fill you in on what we’ve been doing and tell you all sorts of embarrassing things about them before they can get home to their home states to read them. But I’m not promising anything. (And even if I did, I’d break it. I suck like that.)

So let’s all put our hands together and pray I make it through the next 60 hours or so. Because once those girls pull into my driveway in their way cool rental car, everything else is getting pushed to the back burner. I won’t give a rat’s ass what my boss wants done, or if the toilet is clean enough or not, or which sheets are washed and which ones aren’t. Because once they pull in, I’m knocking ~~one~~ a 30-pack back and laughing until tears roll down my face. Because that’s what me and my girls do. :)

Responses to Yesterdays Comments…

* Chelle: I honestly don’t even remember seeing zebras. LOL!

* Mary: Hope you had fun at the zoo today!

* Beth: Hi girl! Email me! We need to catch up! :)

* Susan, Melly, and Kelly: My option of my SIL wanting to be “cool like me” was total sarcasm. I assume you realize this, but felt the need to clarify, just in case. LOL! If anything, she tries to be better than me (which, admittedly, isn’t that hard to achieve), which is why I was shocked by the camo.

* September: LOL about the pink camo! I don’t think I’ve ever seen that girl wear pink a day in my life now I’m thinking about it. However, I do think you hit the nail on the head when you said she could get “sucked into something themey.” That is sooo her! I can just picture her that morning… “Zoo… animals… hunting… camo… COOL!” LOL! All that was missing was the safari hat. But then she couldn’t have worn the visor, so I guess she wanted something in there that reflects her true personality. ;) Oh, but she DID tuck her shirt in, which is something I never, ever, ever do, but that she always, always, always does. So in her own way, she was more “her” than I originally thought. Interesting….

And OMG, I barely take that lens off my camera. Ever. I love that lens in ways no person should love an inanimate object. LOL!

Quote of the Day:
Speak in anger and you'll give the greatest speech you'll ever regret.
--Anonymous

Amazing.

2008-07-20T23:13:00.001-04:00

That’s how I would describe our day at the zoo yesterday. Shocking, I know, given my previous complaints about how I perceived the day would go. And my worries weren’t completely unfounded in terms of children running in all directions and not listening. But for the most part, they were pretty good.

The amazing part of it all started almost after we first got to the zoo (after horrendous traffic, but that’s neither here nor there). Not too far in from the main entrance was the reptile house. A huge (air-conditioned) building with snakes, lizards, etc. We walked around in there about 20 minutes, and then headed back outside to start making our way to the fancy tent where lunch was being catered. (We got into the zoo for free through MIL’s DH’s company, and part of that deal was free lunch.)

Anyway, right outside the reptile house was a zoo employee. A young “kid” (about 21 or so), holding a small snake, talking to kids that walked past, telling them about the snake, etc. Grace (of course) may a bee-line for the guy and soon to follow were Hannah, Gunnar, and Garrett (Gunnar and Garrett are my nephews). So the guy starts talking to all of us about the snake, other snakes, the elephants, etc. and after about 10 minutes, he hands us a paper and says, “You know what? Meet me back here at 2:30 and I’ll give you guys a little ‘behind the scenes’ tour of the hippo feeding.” Awesome!

Honestly, I figured we’d get to go back where only employees go (cool!) and watch the zoo employees feed the hippos. But oh my god, was I wrong.

We met the guy at 2:30 and he said, “OK guys! Follow me!” He lead us through this big wooden gate that said “Employees Only”, which in and of itself was cool. Then we met two other women who work at the zoo who are in charge of feeding the animals. They employees started telling us about hippos. How they’re one of the most dangerous, vicious animals there are (which Steve and I knew because we’re “Animal Planet” geeks), and how even though they’re herbivores and only eat plants, they kill things like it’s their job because they are VERY protective and territorial. It’s nothing for a hippo to kill a tiger, lion, etc. if they feel threatened. Alrighty then. LOL!

So they start handing out rubber gloves to all of us (!) and wheel out a huge garbage can filled with just lettuce. Lots and lots of lettuce.

The two hippos that are at the zoo quickly ran over to us. Now the way it’s set up is that the hippos are basically down below, and we were all standing at the top of a stone wall that was a bit above the hippos’ heads. They said no employee has ever gone into the actual habitat with the hippos because it’s too dangerous.

Well, as soon as the hippos reached us, they lifted their heads, opened their HUGE mouths, and wanted their meal. That’s when we all got to start feeding them. Basically, we took huge handfuls of lettuce and tossed them into the hippos’ mouths. It was just SO cool to see and do. I couldn’t push my shutter button fast enough to take pictures.

And thank god, I had my 50mm prime (fixed) lens on the camera. Basically that means that the lens does not zoom in or out AT ALL, and at 50 mm, you’re basically seeing what you do with your naked eye. So all of the pictures I’m about to share are literally how close we were to everything. Just fascinating. The insides of their mouths are just amazing. I couldn’t believe how HUGE their teeth are! And what’s funny is that those teeth are used strictly for defense, and they use only their lips and tongues to actually eat. Just unbelievable.

And without further ado, why don’t you share in our amazing hippo experience. If you’ve ever wondered what the inside of a hippos mouth looks like, wonder no more. LOL!

These are from when they first wandered over when they realized it was feeding time.

And then, the kids started throwing the lettuce into their mouths.

Wanna see what the insides of their mouths look like? No problem, my friends! ;)

Look at those TEETH! Dear GOD! LOL! (And remember, I can’t zoom with this lens.) ;)

And then, at one point, while the hippo had his mouth closed, Grace and Gunnar got to pet his chin. Awwww! Look at his little tongue. LOL!

It was just such a cool once-in-a-lifetime experience. So, so cool! The kids LOVED it, and admittedly, so did the adults. It was one of those days you never forget and you go to sleep that night knowing you will never have an opportunity like that again. Just a really, really cool day. :)

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But enough about that. I know you all want to know if the sister-in-law wore “The Visor”. And the answer is yes. Yes, she did. I TOLD you all she would. LOL! See?

However, at least in THIS case, the visor made sense. Outside. In the sun. At the zoo. (That’s Steve’s brother, SIL, and their 2 boys in that picture.)

However, what had me TOTALLY flabbergasted (and still does), is that she had camouflage shorts on. Camo. SIL doesn’t “do” camo. Well, apparently she does… I’ve just never seen it. She is soooo not a camo person. She’s strictly Eddie Bauer khaki, polo shirts, etc. To see her in camo almost made me shit my pants. AND they were paired with $2.00 Old Navy flip-flops. What the hell?!?!

So I have several theories here…

1) She’s going through her mid-life crises (she’s the same age as me… 35), and is trying to dress “younger” and trendier.

2) She knows I wear camo whenever possible (because I’m cool like that) and she’s trying to be just like me because she thinks I’m cool.

3) She was trying to look as “zoo like” as possible, and figured that the visor, the camo shorts, and the flip flops made her look all “Safari”.

3) They’re piss poor broke and can only afford to buy $2.50 shoes. (And that’s cool with me. I love my PayLess and WalMart shoes. SHE however, doesn’t.)

It was just weird. Really, really weird. However, I am determined to figure out the mind of this girl come hell or high water, and I will figure out what makes her tick if it’s the last thing I do,dammit. LOL!

Alrighty. I’ll post more zoo pics tomorrow. But I was so hung up on the hippo ones, that I didn’t have a chance to even look much at the others I took yesterday. Later gators! ;)

Help.

2008-07-19T00:35:00.004-04:00

I can’t even begin to describe my day. Seriously. It was one of those days where you just want to crawl into a corner, fold yourself up in the fetal position, and pretend it never happened. It involved “critters” (numerous critters) with more than 2 legs which means I want nothing to do with them, forgetfulness, toilet paper, the IRS, laundry that HAD to been done due to the aforementioned critters, zoo preparation, PMS/hormone-related issues, hideous actions from a member of my family that I'm sick and tired of hearing about, and lots of lots and lots of yelling on my part (due to all of the previous things I mentioned). I hated myself today, that’s how bitchy and annoyed and stressed and positively evil I was. My poor, poor family.

And with that, I’m off to bed. I have to deal with 17 family members in 95-degree heat at a zoo tomorrow that’s 90 minutes away. God. Help. Me.

Oops! Forgot a link last night!

2008-07-18T10:48:00.002-04:00

For those of you that take pictures and get them printed, I found a new photo printing site that has some KILLER deals right now! It's called ArtsCow.com and if you go and sign up, you automatically get 400 FREE photo prints and a FREE 8"x8" photo book! WOOHOO!! There's a bunch of other free credits you can pick up if you visit the Community Forum over there after you join.

I can't vouch for their quality (yet), but I plan on ordering my photo book tonight. And hell, the stuff is free, so even if I never decide to actually buy something from them, I can't really complain after 400 prints, ya know? LOL!

So go here and sign up!

Virtual Smorgasbord

2008-07-18T00:22:00.001-04:00

Random Like a Rock Star

(Shut up. Y’all love my random ramblings and you know it.)

* “Lightly Salted” potato chips do nothing for my cravings. Don’t even think about buying those stupid things again the next time we have a picnic and you offer to bring something, Mom. OK?

* I got my period today. I never know when she’s coming (because I don’t pay attention) so it took me by surprise. Lemme tell you, I am so looking forward to walking around the zoo on Saturday in the predicted 95-degree weather, with 16 other family members, looking for stench-filled public restrooms so I can change my tampon. It doesn’t get any better than that, does it? Sigh.

* And I’m sure my raging hormones will boost my tolerance of my nephew that normally makes me want to carry a flask with me when I know he’s going to be around. If you see a story on the news about a crazy Pennsylvania lady trying to shove her 6-year-old nephew into an empty cage, and that crazy lady looks at the camera and sticks out her tongue while drool runs down her chin, just know that that’s the “secret sign” from that crazy lady to her loyal blog readers as a way of saying hello. Just wave back at your TV screen and know that the lady will be back up and blogging again as soon as she posts bail.

* My insane (literally) neighbor gave me a free pack of cigarettes today because Steve gave him half (not a whole one, mind you) of a watermelon. I’m pretty sure the whole exchange embodies the art of being a redneck, but I’m not sure, since it’s hard to see the “big picture” when you’re one of the parties involved.

* Cinnamon Altoids and beer don’t taste that great when consumed together. Keep that in mind, OK gang?

* Shit. I forgot to make the pig roast invitations again today. Someone remind me tomorrow, OK?

* One week from now, I’ll be sitting here at home, chillin’ with two of my best girlfriends, drinking booze, and making fun of all of you. It’s a shame y’all can’t fly in too. But since you can’t, you’re all fair game in the Make Fun of the People That Aren’t Here game I like to play with my guests. Sucks to be you.

* I’m out of random thoughts, so let’s move on…

Link Love

Sooo… due to my obsessive habit of adding 5 or 6 new blog feeds to my blog reader everyday, I often find myself stumbling upon fantastic websites out there in the Internet world. Today, I found two that made me happy.

First up we have the Fail Blog. OMG! Funny shit! I spent HOURS looking back through the entire blog. It’s all funny pictures and videos of people (or other things) failing miserably at something. There’s stuff like this:

And this:

Seriously. Go there. Now. (Well, as soon as you finish reading my post.) Your sides will hurt from laughing so hard.

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The next site I “found” (i.e., someone else found it and linked to it, like I’m about to do) is Tune Us In. You can convert any of your MP3 files on your computer to FREE ring tones. (I like free shit.) I now have “7 Things I Hate About You” ringing in my ears whenever my sister calls me. It was either that or “Fat Bottomed Girls.” Baahaahaa! Shhhh! Don’t tell her! (Obviously, she doesn’t read this blog. Um, that I’m aware of. Crap.)

But seriously, do me a favor and post in the comments what some of your ring tones are and if they’re for certain people. I get a kick out of that stuff.

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And this last one really is a link filled with love. Tink posted for the first time since her brother-in-law was killed in a car accident. I adore this girl. And now her and her fiance are going to petition for custody of her brother-in-law’s 4-year-old son. Could y’all send out some prayers and positive thoughts that it goes through? Because they’d be kick ass parents to the little boy and I have complete faith that they’d raise him in an unbelievable environment. If you don’t do prayers, throw a penny in a fountain or something and make it your wish. They all deserve it.

A PHOTO (or 2)

At one of the picnics we were at this past weekend, I snapped some pictures of my friend’s little girl. They’re all moving to Montana (or some other far-away state) in two weeks and I’m sad. I’ve known the dad since 5th grade, and we’ve always been great friends. And now, he’s leaving. Sniff.

Anyway, I took some pictures of his little girl and played with them a bit so I could send him the shots. I can’t decide which I like best… the sepia or the BW. Thoughts anyone?

Another Meme!

2008-07-17T00:28:00.001-04:00

I should be going to bed. But I'm not. So here's a Meme all about Steve and I. :)

How long have you been married? 10 years in September.

Where did you meet? A bar in town. LOL!

How long did you date? 18 months from the day we met until the day we got married.

How old is he? 33

Who eats more? Him. It's amazing how much food enters his mouth.

Who said "I love you" first? He did. On my 25th birthday actually.

Who is taller? He is.

Who sings better? Uhhh... not me? But not him either. Hannah? LOL!

Who is smarter? Depends. He's smarter when it comes to math and concrete. I'm smarter when it comes to everything else. LOL!

Whose temper is worse? Mine. (Blush.)

Who does the laundry? He does his own and I do mine and the girls'.

Who sleeps on the right side of the bed? Me

Who pays the bills? Literally pays? Both of us.

Who cooks dinner? Me usually. But he makes his own when he wants fish. Blech.

Who drives when you are together? Steve does.

Who is more stubborn? Me. Hands down. Unfortunately.

Who kissed whom first? I dunno. We both just went in for the kill. LOL!

Who is the first to admit to being wrong? Steve. I'm never wrong. Baahaahaa!

Whose parents do you see the most? Mine.

Who proposed? Steve.

What's his best physical attribute? His ass. Seriously. It's sculpture-like.

Who has more friends? Oooo... tough one. Probably me.

What are you most proud of him for? Being the hardest damn worker I've ever met in my life.

Who has more siblings? Me. I've got 2. He's got 1.

Who wears the pants in the family? Uhh... we both do?

And here we go again…

2008-07-17T00:03:00.001-04:00

Random, useless thoughts by Allison. Don’t lie… you know you love it.

* I have a “thing” with names with a capital letter in the middle of them. I have nothing against the person. Just their names. For example, MaryAnn. Why the capital "A"? Why not just Maryann? Or Mary Ann? Capital letters weren't meant to be in the middle of a word. Just at the beginning. So from now on, please refer to me as AlliSon. Or AliEn. The choice is yours. But if you don't acknowledge me in that way, I won't respond. Starting... NOW!

* They should make Garanimals for adults. You know... that line of children's clothing where there are different animals on the tags. Kids can just pick any articles of clothing with the same animals and they match. I'm a fashion idiot. I wear jeans, shorts, and tees, and often don't know if those match. Wouldn't it be nice if I could just wake up and grab 2 giraffes and know I was good to go? And hell, they could even make it more adult by using pictures of booze instead of animals... "Well, I guess I'll wear the strawberry daiquiri today." Or "I'm feeling like wearing the six packs of beer to work this morning." I need to take this idea to some investors.

* You know your life is in the shitter when you watch "Celebrity Circus". Seriously. I need to get one. (A life I mean. I already have a shitter.)

* Just when I thought our weekends this summer were finally calming down and going unplanned, I find out all sorts of other events we're supposed to be at, visitors that are flying in, etc. WTH? For the love of god, can I have ONE weekend where I've got nothing to do except sit on my fat ass on the back porch and watch the kids play in the yard?

* I have a slight personal dilemma going on at work. It's totally self-induced, but something's bugging me and I have no idea how to approach the guy that my issue is with, since he scares the living shit out of me. Sigh. It's not a big deal to anyone else at all. And even HE doesn't realize what he's doing, I'm sure. But it's bothering me.

* I just re-read that last one and realized it makes it sound like I'm being sexually harassed or something. LOL! It's nothing even remotely like that. It just involves me creating a brochure for my company that this guy wants based on another brochure he likes (from another company). I have no problem gathering inspiration, ideas, etc. from someone else's work and making them my own in my own sort of way. But this guy pretty much wants me to copy this brochure so that it's practically identical. I don't think the guy has any CLUE that it's not only illegal (I assume), but that it's a complete slap in the face to the person that took the time to design the other company's brochure. I have a real problem with that. So now I have to figure out how to approach it. Dammit.

* Ok. You REALLY know you need a life when the winner of celebrity circus was just announced and you jumped out of your chair with your fist in the air, yelling, "WOOHOO!" [shaking head] I need help. Serious, serious help.

* Since Kelly commented on my post from yesterday, I have a serious paranoia that all of my readers wear visors and I just offended every one of them. To make up for it, I'll go buy one tomorrow and wear it every where I go. Work... the grocery store... the gas station... parties... the zoo on Saturday... even to bed. Please forgive me readers. Please?

* It feels weird when I post something here and don't have a photo to add. But tonight, I really don't have one to add. I'm uncomfortable with that, but I'm too lazy to do anything about it.

* I'm hungry. But it's 11:15, and pigging out right now doesn't seem like the smartest move. But I'm hungry dammit.

* Why is it that no matter how many things I get done, my "To Do" list just keeps getting bigger? I'm kind of sick of being a grown-up.

* I totally forgot that I NEED to make the pig roast invitations this week and get them in the mail and in email inboxes. It sneaks up on us every damn year. Crap.

* Why is it so hard for a grown woman to find non-geriatric shorts in the right length? I love that Bermuda shorts are in style right now and that's great. But why are the only other options the ones with a 1" inseam. How about a nice, happy medium? Because when my pubic hair is longer than my shorts, there's a problem.

* On a related note, I found a skirt online that I really, REALLY liked. The description said it's a whopping 12" long from the top of the waist to the hem. I held a ruler up at my waist and realized that if you factor in my widened hips and upper thighs (since pushing 2 human beings out of my crotch), and the fact that the skirt would have to stretch around that, I could basically wear the damn skirt as a belt. Sigh.

* Thirty-five year old women shouldn't like the Jonas Brothers. Not that I know any 35-year-old women that like them. Nuh uh. I'm just sayin'...

* I'm totally buying this shirt to wear at the pig roast, and none of you can stop me.

* Or this one.

* Never mind. I'm all over this one.

* Oh WAIT! Maybe one of these?

* I think that's it. It's time for bed. More tomorrow, gang.

I {heart} Aaron.

2008-07-16T00:01:00.001-04:00

Aaron rules. Aaron is my hairdresser. I love Aaron. I’ve only been going to him for about a year now (which translates into about 3 haircuts… I’m soooo bad about keeping up with my hair), but he’s never failed me. Whether it’s cut, color, or both, the man freakin’ rules. He’s one of those hairdressers where you walk in, and when he asks what you want done, you shrug, say, “Whatever you want,” and let him just have at it.

He’s never given me a cut or color I didn’t like. And today was no different. I hadn’t been there in 2 months and my hair was seriously showing it. He slapped some blonde highlights on me and then shagged me out again with my cut. I just adore him. My hair is naturally pretty dark, so I always feel like a totally different person when I have it lightened up. Blondes DO have more fun, don’t they? Dammit. I knew it.

Anyway, here I am in all of my new ‘do glory.

(Editors note: Please excuse the subject’s lack of ~~any~~ much makeup. As much as she knows she’d look better if she took the 5 seconds to slap on some mascara and lip gloss, she’s kind of lazy and avoids it at all cost.)

And this time (unlike ALL other times), I’ve already scheduled my next trim. The day before the pig roast at 10:00 AM. We figure he can trim it, blow my ~~‘fro~~ hair out, and I can have it ready to go the next day for the party. That’s right, folks. I only wash my hair every other day. Sue me if it bothers you that much.

Anyway, he’s going to cut Steve’s ~~shrub~~ hair at 9:45 and then hook me up that morning. He said him and his partner are coming to the pig roast, so we figure I can show off his handiwork. LOL!

Anyway, I love that guy. So if you’re ever in PA and want me to hook you up, let me know. Seriously. The man has found his calling.

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And on another note, this Saturday, the WHOLE family on Steve’s side is supposed to go to the Philadelphia Zoo. We get in free through my mother-in-law’s husband’s company, so we couldn’t really say no.

And part of me is looking forward to it. Not because of the animals (we all know how I feel about 4-legged critters)… not because of the fun the kids will have (although that’s part of it)… and not because I realize that if I’m not home all day, I won’t have to clean. Oh no. My excitement is because of my sister-in-law. Because, see, I know she’s going to wear “The Visor.” That oh-so-infamous visor.

It’s just a plain khaki visor that she wears a lot in the summer. Not when she’s golfing (when it would make sense… although she doesn’t golf, so…). Not when she’s at a garden party at the country club (where it’s part of the standard issued uniform). Oh no. She just wears it to random places. She wore it to Grace’s bowling party a few weeks ago, for example. Why? Your guess is as good as mine. Because, despite the forecasts, there was no blaring sun beating down at us inside that bowling alley that day. I’m all for hats. I love my hats. They’re all good. But visors? Aren’t they for, like, old people and stuff?

So anyway, I know she’s going to wear it on Saturday. And then I’m going to take 385 random, unsuspecting photos of her while we’re there. Just so I have something to ~~make fun of~~ blog about that night, for all of you to enjoy right along with me.

Because in SIL’s case, we’ve moved beyond the funky/pathetically fake eyebrows, solid color polo shirts, and all things khaki, and moved onto “The Visor”. [shaking head] I just don’t get it…

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But now it’s exactly midnight and I’m beat. I’ve been up until around 3:00 AM the past few nights, and then up for the day for good around 6:00 AM, so I REALLY need to make myself go to bed now. Peace out…

Complex anyone?

2008-07-15T00:54:00.001-04:00

Hi. My name’s Allison, and I’m starting to develop some serious complexes.

Everyone else says, in a sing-song voice ----> “Welcome, Allison!”

Seriously though. I don’t have a low self-esteem. Sure, there are things I’m a bit self-conscious about. Like my hideous teeth. (Seriously… they’re bad.) And sure, I have a slight belly “pooch” after giving birth to two kids. But nothing that bothers me every second of the day. Or that makes me want not to leave my home for fear of scaring someone. Generally speaking, I’m pretty comfortable with myself. I am who I am, and I just figure people can take it or leave it, ya know? Hell, the other day, I posted this self-portrait of myself on my Project 365 blog. I decided I wanted a picture of me sans makeup and sans Photoshopping. Kind of like those Before pictures you see of cover models.

Now I DID boost the contrast of the photo, lighten it up a bit because it was underexposed, etc. But I didn’t do my usual checklist of fading the eye bags and circles, evening out my skin tone, etc.

If I can post that and not think twice, then chances are, I’m ok with being me, right? I really am cool with who I am. Curly hair… straight hair… unshaped eyebrows… non-existent lower lashes… etc. It’s me. If you don’t like it, don’t look. [shrug]

But EVERY few days, damn Facebook sends me an email. And every damn time I open that damn email, it says the same thing. It says that my other friends on Facebook have compared me with their other friends and then lists how I stack up against the group. And EVERY time, it tells me my so-called “friends” have the same thoughts as far as my strengths and weaknesses go:

STRENGTHS:
most creative
best public speaker
happiest

WEAKNESSES:
most generous
best mannered

Now, as honored as I am with the Most Creative, Best Public Speaker, and Happiest titles I’ve had bestowed on me, the Weaknesses are kind of bugging me. I’ll even give them portions of the “Best Mannered” weakness. I can belch like a man, fart better than a man (and often do), and tend to say inappropriate things at inappropriate times. I’ve been known (in the past week), to announce that I really, really need to pass gas (I have some serious digestive issues and I’m not being funny here), and I apologize ahead of time that one might “slip out.” So there’s definitely some “redneck manners” going on there.

BUT, if you’re a waitress, cashier, bartender, drive-thru worker, or any other crappy job holder, I’m the customer you’re begging for. I am so overly nice and polite to people that it’s almost sickening. And that’s because I KNOW how much those jobs tend to suck. I’m understanding, I make you laugh, I make you smile, and I compensate you in whatever way I can. People love me.

And most generous? That’s my weakness? OK. So I do tend to promise things to people and then not follow through. But it’s not because I’m not generous. It’s because I’m damn lazy and don’t feel like finding the promised item, packaging it up, driving to the post office, and mailing the damn thing.

And sure, I promise a lot of people Photoshop stuff. But then I start working on it and either get bored or hit a creative brick wall, and I close it, never to be remembered again (because I’m an idiot) unless you specifically ask me for it again. Or I actually finish it, but I’m so afraid you’ll hate it that I don’t ever send it. Because if you ask me to rework or change something, chances are you’ll never get the damn thing. Not because I’m bitter. But because to ask me to do something twice is just ridiculous if you really know me that well. I can’t be that focused. Ever.

So I’ve decided to start sending those damn Facebook emails straight into my Spam folder. Who needs that kind of negative energy, right?

And because I didn’t feel completely beat down today…

I did some Photoshop work for a good friend of mine. And I actually finished it AND I even sent it to her. And as a thank you, she sent me a gift card to Hollister (which was not agreed upon because I said I didn’t want compensation, and which I was kind of embarrassed (yet thrilled) about). Hollister and Aeropostale are my two favorite stores, so the fact that she even knew me well enough to know that tells me something about her.

But I digress…

So she sends me the gift card and I start browsing the site. I was finding a ton of things I liked and started adding them to my shopping cart. And then I remembered…

I look ridiculous in the kind of shirt that every damn girl I know seems to be wearing these days -- those “babydoll” shirts that are a bit fitted right under your boobs and then flare out a bit.

Like this…

Or this…

Or even this…

(Note: I like blue stuff. Sue me.)

But when I happen to slide one of these latest fashion trends on, I look either:

1) Pregnant…

2) Way larger than I actually am…

3) Like Hannah decided to bring one of her dolls to life and dress her up for the day.

Seriously. It’s laughable. Really. I look hideous. I wouldn’t lie to you. And I’m NOT overweight. Not even remotely. I’m between a size 6 and 8 these days, which is actually below average for women my age. And I’m thrilled with that! I weigh now what I weighed when I first met Steve over 10 years ago. So that’s NOT why these types of shirts look stupid on me. I swear, it must be my body shape or something, because these shirts ain’t digging my body no matter how much I want them to. Sigh.

So anyway, as I browsed the Hollister site tonight (and I did find a ton of stuff I was more than happy to buy and not look stupid), looking at all of the shirts I wanted to buy, I thought about the fact that not only am I (apparently) the rudest person on the planet that won’t share a damn thing (according to those Facebook “friends”), but that I can’t even dress in the latest fashions because people will laugh at me for that too. I’ll start getting voted on at Facebook as being “Chick most likely to look like she’s wearing a sack.” Or “Most likely to be knocked up and not telling us.” Yeah. That would be great. Not. [sigh]

So I’m just going to keep taking ridiculously close up photos of my various body parts. And then I’ll Photoshop them and call them “art.” Because that’s what those “Most Creative” people such as myself do, right? We do “artsy” things. And then we spit in people’s faces, give our family members used gifts at Christmas, and we do it all while looking like a beached, middle-aged woman trying desperately to look like a teenager in the latest fashions. Yup. That’s me in a nutshell. Nice.

But hell, at least everyone seems to love my hot wing dip, right? That’s something I suppose. Yup. Put that shit right on my tombstone. Sigh. <---- Recipe will be posted tomorrow morning. Don’t miss it. People will love you. For real.

Quote of the Day:
A thing is not necessarily true because badly uttered, nor false because spoken magnificently.
--Saint Augustine of Hippo

Braids, braids, braids!

2008-07-14T15:35:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, my mom took the girls to see the new American Girl Doll movie that’s out in the theatres. They were so excited to go! They even both took their American Girl Dolls with them and wanted me to braid all of their hair. LOL!

They ended up loving it, which is cool.

Later that night, Hannah decided she wanted tiny little braids all over her head. Um, great. Sigh. So I spent the next hour and a half putting braids in her hair for daycare today.

And then she decided she was a rock star.

That’s right folks… from sweet little girl with her doll to head-banging rock star in the span of 24 hours. Great.

The Day of Threes

2008-07-12T11:46:00.001-04:00

Today is the Day of Many Picnics. Three to be exact. And they all start promptly at 3:00. And we’re basically obligated to attend all three of them. And thus begins the planning. Which one do we go to first? Which one do we want to end at tonight (i.e., the one that’s the most fun)? Which one could we, if we HAD to, skip without pissing anyone off? Sigh.

So as of right now, at 3:00, we’ll be heading to the end-of-season softball picnic for Grace’s team. I’m kind of looking forward to this one. The people are all nice, the girls are the team are great kids, etc. This is the only one I’m required to bring food to (thank god), so it’s probably good we're going to that one first. We're estimating we'll be there an hour or two (probably closer to two).

The next stop is sort of up in the air. Steve's cousin's little girl is turning 5, and since it's family, we're sort of obligated the most to go to this one. But it's the one we really don't want to go to. At all. The kids do. Steve and I could take it or leave it. It's also the one closest to our house (maybe a mile down the road), so it would be nice to end there tonight and just dart on home. BUT, we really don't want to stay that long, so if we went there second, we'd have the third picnic as our excuse to leave. BUT, if we go to the other picnic first, we could stay there almost all day and then just ditch the birthday party and explain later. Hmmm...

My MIL is insisting we at least stop by the birthday party. She keeps reminding us that the pig roast is coming up and that we need to make appearances at these things if we want people to show up at the pig roast. Lady, the people having this party will be at the pig roast whether we show up or not. And I HATE that people think like that... "Hey, they couldn't make it to ours, so screw going to theirs." Steve's family is CRAZY about this and has made for more than a few family feuds and comments behind people's backs. [rolling eyes]

Party #3 on the list is the picnic for my friend since 5th grade, who is moving across the country in a few weeks. Realistically, it could be a really long time before we see him and his family again. This picnic is the one with our whole group of friends and we always have a blast. And there will be a water slide and two kiddie pools for the kids to play in all day, so that's cool. But I KNOW if we go to this one second, we'll probably never make it to the third one (the oh-so-important birthday party). Crap.

I don't know what we'll do yet. I do, however, know that by tonight, the kids will be exhausted, we'll probably all smell like ass and be all sweaty (it's hot today), and we'll be stuffed full of crappy picnic food and beer (me and Steve... no beer in the kids). I'm sure we'll have fun at all the places we end up, but it still kind of sucks that we have three obligations in one day, ya know?

And now, I'm off to finish laundry, clean up the house a bit, try to restrain myself from beating the living tar out of my kids (they're both being a bit, um, "challenging" today), making my famous hot wing dip for the softball picnic (remind me to post the recipe... it kicks ass), shower, get dressed, do my pain-in-the-ass hair, pack everything we need for the picnics, try not to forget the birthday card, pack my camera, and wish the day was over already.

Have a great day everybody!

The Alien Night Life

2008-07-11T14:24:00.001-04:00

So I know that many (if not all) of you sit around on a regular basis, wondering what me and my little Alienettes are doing. Well, last night, I decided to document, in photos, what a typical evening is like around here. So grab a drink (it’s a long one, folks), sit back, and prepare to be thankful you don’t live here with us.

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It all started when both girls decided to play dress up. This, in and of itself, is weird. Hannah plays dress up ALL the time. But Grace? HELL no. It’s not her thing. Why? Well, because, generally speaking, it’s a girly thing. But for some reason, last night, she decided she wanted to dress up like a rock star, just like Hannah.

So they busted out Hannah’s Cheetah Girls dress up kit and had at it. Great. They both looked cute… it kept them occupied… etc. Then they grabbed Grace’s drum and Hannah’s (working) microphone and put on a little concert for me. Here, my friends, is where it quickly went downhill…

First up was Grace. Now keep in mind that the shirt she’s wearing is supposed to cover her stomach (LOL!), but when you’re the size of a 9-year-old, you’re kind of shit out of luck when it comes to these things. I also like the creative genius who strung the bracelets on the fake necklaces. BRILLIANT!

Next up was Hannah. As can be seen by the look on her face, she was dead serious about the whole thing. It was like she was channeling Hannah Montana’s spirit.

Sing it like you wrote it, girlfriend! WOOHOO!!!

Then it was Grace’s turn again. By this point (about 5 minutes later), she had lost the serious side of her rockstar debut and morphed back into the Grace I love. How, you ask? Why, by singing a song about farting, of course. Because nothing says rock star like flatulence does. I will give her credit though. She acted it all out too by making farting noises and holding the microphone at her ass.

And then she tried to hang herself because the fake farts smelled so bad.

Not to be outdone by her big sister, Hannah sang HER farting song next. They made me so proud, I actually got a little teary. [happy sigh]

Hannah decided that pointing at the culprit would further get her point across. Because otherwise, how would the audience know where that awful smell was coming from.

Hers were so bad, that she skipped the hanging and went right to the pass-out. Nice.

We administered CPR and she was fine. Then it was time to jump. Because what’s more fun than random jumping?

OMG! What IS that? Hannah or a freaky-ass bird?

Grace threw in some of her gymnastics skills and really impressed the spectators.

Now Hannah’s bored and pissed because she can’t perform the same jumping skills as her sister. However, she CAN “belly dance” and suck her stomach in enough to see every damn bone and muscle in her naval. Frankly, it’s disgusting and a sure sign that this child’s mother isn’t feeding her properly and she’s malnourished. It’s a tragedy really…

But that wasn’t getting enough attention, so she moved on to the couch performance.

RUN!

ROLL!

CRASH!

Pass out again. (Hey, it’s tiring being this entertaining.)

While Hannah was performing her sofa gymnastics, Grace had left the room. I assumed she was taking her intermission break, but shortly after Hannah’s second collapse, Grace wandered back into the room. Apparently, Hannah’s belly dancing had inspired her and she pulled out a few belly tricks of her own. That’s right folks. She had drawn a face on her stomach. I, personally, was just relieved to find out that she hadn’t used the permanent black Sharpie that I thought she had.

Cute little bugger, isn’t he?

You know where this is leading, right? There was no way Hannah was letting her sister steal the spotlight again. Enter Belly Friend #2.

Look mom! It’s TWINS!

Hey sis, I love ya, but can you stop squashing my face, please?

After that, it got out of hand (Ya think?) and I had to put the camera down, bring things back down to a dull roar, and, um, give the girls a bath.

So there you have it. A fairly typical night in the House of the Aliens. The activities vary, but they almost all, at some point, involve farting, burping, inappropriate behavior on the furniture, and things that end up making a bath or shower mandatory.

Sooo… who wants to come visit and bring your kids? There’s plenty of markers here for everyone…

Long Day.

2008-07-11T01:00:00.001-04:00

Well, sort of. Today was just one of those days that seemed to fly by, and yet, also seemed to drag. I think it’s because I was ~~extremely~~ sort of lazy and didn’t do ~~any~~ most of the things I wanted to get done. Not that we all don’t deserve a day like that once in awhile, but I still end up feeling like a big piece of shit at the end of the day, along with stressed because now I’ll have twice as much to do tomorrow.

Oh! But I did manage to finish 2 layouts that were both already halfway done. So um, yeah. I guess that counts for something, right?

And before you call social services on me after seeing this next one, no, Grace is not that pale in real life. I ran a bleaching action on the photo because I wanted a dreamy sort of look.

But anyway, I digress…

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I had a big, long blog post all written out in my head today. Tonight, I was going to post the photos of my kids dressed as rock stars while drawing on their own stomachs with markers. (What? Is that weird?)

And then I was going to talk about how I watched a FANTASTIC movie today and how it kept me riveted the entire time. But that if you don’t like violence, I can assure you, you won’t like this movie.

But if you don’t mind some guts, blood, and shooting people in the head, I promise you, you won’t be disappointed.

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After that, I was going to address the recent people that have been posting on Internet boards I frequent, here on the blog, out there in Internet Land, etc. asking about coming to the pig roast. Now although I’m 99.9% sure that 99.9% of you are very “normal” every day people, I just can’t chance it. I’ve always been very careful to not mention my last name here on the blog, not give the exact town I live in, etc.

For the most part, I’m pretty open and free online. It’s the honest to god truth that ALL of my very best girlfriends are people I’ve met online. I’ve emailed with them for years, talked to them on the phone, met most of them in person, etc. and they’re fantastic.

BUT, I’d be lying if I said I liked all of the people I’ve met through the Internet. My first glimpse into the world of Internet psychos was about 4 years ago, when a great “friend” of mine asked if she could fly up here from Florida to stay in our rental unit in our backyard so she could “clear her head” and make some decisions regarding her failing marriage.

Well, once she got here, she totally mooched off of me and Steve, started sleeping with one of Steve’s friends within 2 or 3 weeks of being here, stayed about 6 months longer than she originally said she would, never found a job, which means she never had money and continued the mooching, and then ~~thankfully~~ finally snuck out in the middle of the night one night, leaving ALL of her photos of her 4-year-old son at the time. But hell, if she’s going to desert the kid, why not desert the photos too, right?

Anyway, after a threatening phone call and then email, I finally got $300 in cash mailed to me by her father to cover her electric bill, phone bill, etc. (which didn’t even come close to covering it all, but it was better than nothing).

My second run in with Internet deception was when a good friend at the time flew in with her husband to come to our pig roast. They did nothing but cause trouble, which resulted in the husband getting in a fist fight at the pig roast with one of Steve’s friends.

A few months after that, I came to realize that she wasn’t even remotely the person I thought she was and we haven’t spoken since. And I’m cool with that.

Now although I wouldn’t call either of these people “psycho,” I can say that my life would’ve been better off without ever having them in it. It also taught me that what you “see” online isn’t always an accurate depiction of the person in real life.

So although we’d love to have all of you at the pig roast theoretically, I just can’t tell you where it is. Because it’s at our house, and once you know where we live, all sorts of scary things could occur. And I can’t email any of you because then you’ll know my full name, and again, scary things could occur.

So please accept my sincere apology, but those of you asking about the pig roast that I don’t actually know are just going to have to enjoy the photos I post afterwards and pretend you were here. It’s truly nothing personal. I just can’t take that chance again.

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Then I was going to blog about how there are many, many stupid nutjobs in the world and then offer up some proof. But that will have to wait for another day and another post.

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And last, but most importantly, I wanted to ask for thoughts and prayers for a dear friend of mine. Tink lost her future brother-in-law, Nash, in a fatal car accident last night after he left her and Hoop’s house. Obviously, I didn’t know Nash. But he was only 24, was a single dad to a 4-year-old boy, and was scheduled to interview for a job with a local sheriff’s department on Monday. I “met” Tink through this blog, and over the years, we’ve become good friends… commenting on each other’s blogs, emailing, and even talking on the phone. She’s an amazing spirit, and has always talked about her and Hoop’s family with nothing but pure love.

I’m sure the pain they’re feeling right now is indescribable and feels like it will never go away. But maybe, if we could all offer some prayers and positive thoughts for the entire family, we can help ease that pain just a little bit. I’ve been thinking about all of them since I read her blog earlier today and it changed my entire night. I played with my kids more… hugged and kissed them more… yelled way less… and just kept reminding myself that any of our lives can be snatched away from us in a split second. So hug your kids, kiss your spouses, tell your parents you love them, and offer up some prayers for those that have lost loved ones.

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Quote of the Day:
None of you really has faith unless he desires for his neighbor what he desires for himself.
--Prophet Muhammad

Who? Me? Ohhh… you said Meme!

2008-07-10T00:37:00.001-04:00

1. Where is your cell phone? My purse.
2. Your significant other? Sleeping
3. Your hair? In desperate need of a haircut, but currently up in a bandana.
4. Your mother? Amazingly helpful
5. Your father? Tolerant
6. Your favorite thing? My camera
7. Your dream last night? Couldn’t tell ya.
8 Your favorite drink? Beer
9. Your dream/goal? A stress-free life
10. The room you’re in? Living Room
11. Your hobby? photography and digital scrapbooking
12. Your fear? Drowning
13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Where I am now, but 6 years older
14. What you’re not? Tired
15. Muffins? Not my thing
16. One of your wish list items? More RAM
17. Where you grew up? PA
18. The last thing you did? Smoked a cigarette
19. What are you wearing? Gym shorts and an Air Force t-shirt
20. Favorite gadget? MP3 Player
21. Your pets? None! WOOHOO!
22. Your computer? Not fast enough for me.
23. Your mood? A bit PMS-y
24. Missing someone? Not particularly
25. Your car? Honda Accord
26. Something you’re not wearing? A bra
27. Favorite store? Aeropostale
28. Like someone? Yeah
29. Your favorite color? Pink
30. When is the last time you laughed? today
31. Last time you cried? Don’t remember.

OK. This is where you normally tag people. But I’m not a tagging kind of person. So feel free to consider yourself tagged the next time you’re not sure what to blog about.

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Me Rambling…

* Today was so non-productive. That always pisses me off. Sigh.

* I went to the grocery store today and forgot over half the stuff I went there for… And I even had a list. Sigh.

* We have THREE picnics/parties to go to this Saturday. And we really can’t miss any of them for various reasons. And they all start at 3:00. Sigh.

* Stacy’s mom has got it goin’ on. Sigh. (Just seeing if you’re paying attention.)

* I had a brief moment today when I considered how cool I’d look with my nose pierced (no ring… just a small stud). Can we say “mid-life crises”? Sigh.

* I AM getting my naval pierced though, and none of you can stop me, dammit.

* I decided I have an addictive personality. No shit, right?

* I think audio books/books on tape are ridiculous and can’t imagine EVER enjoying one. I’ll read my own books, thank you very much.

* I’ve always thought I should become a member of a “black church” (not trying to stereotype, but I honestly have no CLUE what actual religion it is that I’m thinking of, so I’m going based on what on TV and in movies). I want to go in, here some kick ass gospel music, yell a lot, dance, clap, and enjoy being there. Because until one of those gets started around here, you won’t see me getting up on a Sunday. (Yes. I suck. Deal with it. And yes, I know I’m going to hell. I’ve accepted it and I’ll save you the room next door to mine.)

* Loved some of the dances on “So You Think You Can Dance” tonight. I’d post some YouTube videos tomorrow, but none of them were that exciting.

* I wish I could sing. I’d walk around singing to everyone I know (and people I don’t). Singing rules.

* I absolutely, positively NEED to make our pig roast invitations tomorrow and right now, I don’t really feel like it. Let’s hope that feeling changes.

* I finally took a picture of my signed Grace Potter shirt today. See? I told you it’s cool. It’s like rock star and redneck, all rolled into one. A guitar and a varmint and pink. What could be better? (And please note Grace’s signature smack dab on my left boob. Sweet.

* Then the kids decided they wanted a shirt too. So I scanned the sticker I bought for them at the concert, printed in on some Iron-On transfer paper, and had at it. This is Hannah modeling hers.

* And no, she’s not pissed, or sad, or angry, or even annoyed. She said this is her “Rock Star Face.” Rock on kid! Keep on jammin’!

* And no, her hair isn’t that greasy. She had just gotten out of the shower.

I need to go to bed tonight. No, seriously. I need to go, like, NOW. G’night!

Quote of the Day:
Give a man a fire and he's warm for a day, but set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life.
--Terry Pratchett

Just Ramblin’….

2008-07-08T23:27:00.002-04:00